Used to be a OGer/UGer, but deleted my old account a couple yers back and only lurk now, but that's a story for another day. I'm not exactly sure why I'm posting this now... maybe for encouragement, advice, to vent a bit, or to just be told to stop being a fat fuck. Either way, sorry for the FRAT, but if you read it anyway, thank you.
I'm currently 34, 6'2, and fluctuate between 255 and 260 lbs. I haven't felt in shape since my early 20's. At 210 and under I feel good. 260 is my "holy fuck weight" and the most I've ever been was 265. Anytime I go above 260 I diet and try to work out but my fucked up back and knee eventually break me down and I stop. A while ago I made it down to 230lbs, but a switch in work schedule and a new daughter broke my routine and I ballooned back up.
About 3 months ago my 7 year old mentioned how I don't play and wrestle with them as much as I used to and I've been depressed ever since. My last big push was to get in shape for my kids and that's when I made it to 230. I decided then it was time to stop being lazy and fucking do it this time and not give up. I'm now a fat guy. That guy at the beach with his shirt on, and I hate it. I know I'm not gonna be 20 again or ever see 210lbs, but my oldest is 7, youngest is 2 and I at least gotta get healthy enough to enjoy their childhood the right way with them.
3 months ago when I began this latest attempt, I tried a different approach. Instead of the scale, I set strength goals. A friend of mine got me an amazing deal on a home gym set up through an estate sale. Basically, about $1300 worth of stuff for $200. I told everyone I got it for my kids as my 2 boys are in wrestling, karate, and BJJ and have been wanting to "work out with Dad" but I really got it because I was depressed. Teaching my kids to work out and be healthy is a side bonus in this (hopefully). They have never seen me "in shape" as my oldest being born is the time frame of my weight skyrocketing. I didn't realize Dads add pregnancy weight as well.
So yea... the goals. When I began I was at my heaviest, and weakest point in my adult life. I literally could not do a single pull-up, less than 5 push-ups without stopping, and was too ashamed to even try a max bench. Didn't even attempt it until last week.... The goals I set were I want to be able to do 50 push-ups, 10 pull-ups, and bench my own weight (the benching my own weight I haven't been able to do since I weighed about 180 lbs) As of today, I was able to do 3 pull-ups in a row (2 with good form, the third was rounding up) I can almost do 30 pushups (I fail around 28 give or take one) and I was able to bench press 210lbs 3 times. I got a long way to go, but I feel I've come a good ways too.
Now I guess here is where my post comes to a purpose... I'm hitting a wall. I feel better and stronger than when I started, but I don't feel like I'm getting stronger at all at this point. Kind of been where I'm at now for a couple weeks.
Also, my weight... today was 258. To this point I been thinking ok, well I'm getting stronger, so maybe muscle is replacing fat? But it's not... I don't look like I've lost any size at all. My arms are a little bigger, but mostly they just hardened, not really increased. Unless I flex you can't really tell I've been working out at all.
Now, my diet went from shitty, to less shitty. I know myself, I'm too weak to stick with a clean diet, so I'm allowing myself to keep not so great dinners, as long as they are cooked at home. Examples... traded McDonalds for burgers and fries at home. The only true improvement is I got rid of all sodas and drinks in exchange for water, and got rid of all snacks like chips etc for fruits and salads (and occasional PB and J sandwich)
So yea, I know cleaning up my diet more will help lose some fat, and I'm working on it slowly, but fuck... 3 months of busting my ass and I'm still feeling like I'm gonna fail this time. For a fat guy, I do have some great cardio... I don't smoke and rarely drink and when I work out I go as hard as I can to the point when I'm done I feel like I can barely move. I just feel like I'm not getting anywhere now...
My workout isn't a set routine... I usually give it at least a solid hour (more if I have the time) and by solid hour I mean one exercise to the next... no breaks except for a quick drink or to set up the next station. I'm doing this at least 4 to 5 days a week, I try for everyday but don't always have time.
My back is fucked and my knee isn't much better, so deadlifts and squats are out of the question, but I can do almost anything else with that machine I got. Most of it is seated stuff, but also have a lot of dumbbells and free weights for other things. I don't know what I expect to get from this thread, but if you read this far, thanks for your time. Feel free to yell at me or call me a fat ass or something. If you are really bored and want to help me maybe you can come up with a routine for me? here is a link to the same machine my friend helped me get.. plus I have alot of free weights and such as well as things that came in the lot with the sale. https://www.walmart.com/ip/Marcy-Deluxe-Diamond-Elite-Smith-Cage-Workout-Machine-Total-Body-Gym-MD-9010G/49843831
My kids have Karate so I won't be able to reply for a couple hours, if there is even something to reply to lol.
My advice, if I may give you one, is to just do whatever you find enjoyable.
For now, in my case I enjoy doing dumbbell curls for higher reps. It has very little with overall strength/fitness, which should be my current primary goal, but I have felt a lot better since I stopped sticking to my initial plan.
In.
Exercise debatably doesn't have a huge impact on weight loss. Some believe it has a larger impact on diet adherence.
I think we should start with your diet. Track your cals for 1 week using a phone app like Myfitnesspal and report back the daily cals and macro splits. The app will tell you all that.
With regards to diet, after more info we can advise more, but realize, if you want to be 210lbs you are on a diet for the rest of your life. Forever. It's not temporary. You can lose weight on a diet and if you go back to eating how you used to, you will just go back to the weight you used to be.
Now, a diet doesn't have to be miserable. You're a big dude and your metabolism can stuff down a lot of cals. This doesn't mean you have to eat chicken breasts and broccoli the rest of your life. You just have to be cognizant of your portions, your daily intake, and generally favor protein sources above all else. 
My advice is when you say frat, you provide a fucking frat
acm5060 - Exercise debatably doesn't have a huge impact on weight loss. Some believe it has a larger impact on diet adherence.
I think we should start with your diet. Track your cals for 1 week using a phone app like Myfitnesspal and report back the daily cals and macro splits. The app will tell you all that.
With regards to diet, after more info we can advise more, but realize, if you want to be 210lbs you are on a diet for the rest of your life. Forever. It's not temporary. You can lose weight on a diet and if you go back to eating how you used to, you will just go back to the weight you used to be.
Now, a diet doesn't have to be miserable. You're a big dude and your metabolism can stuff down a lot of cals. This doesn't mean you have to eat chicken breasts and broccoli the rest of your life. You just have to be cognizant of your portions, your daily intake, and generally favor protein sources above all else.
Thanks man. Just installed that app, I'll check it out and give it a shot.
As far as 210... that's never happening again lol, I realize that. I'd say realistically if I could hit 225-230 again I'd feel I accomplished something, but as I said in the FRAT, my goals aren't based on the scale this time as that kicked my ass too many times before. I'm still checking it, but I want to feel better first, which is why I set the strength based goals for myself, and second I'd obviously like a physical appearance change, for myself mostly, but also for my wife and kids so they "see" that I'm doing it. I want to be a better example for my kids, and not look so terrible for my wife. She'd never say it, but obviously she'd appreciate a more fit husband.
As far as my diet, I know it sucks, but have cleaned it up a lot recently, but it definitely needs work. I leave for work at 2:30 am, have time for VERY QUICK snacks twice a day, then lunch, then I'm home for dinner and whatever else for the rest of the day....
Today's food thus far was
2 apples for breakfast (has to always be something I can eat while I drive)
1 cheap Kroger brand "protein/snack bar" at break
another of the same protein bar for lunch
And just got home, so won't eat again until dinner when my kids are out of school, but normally this is where my junk food would hit. Chips and shit, or ice cream. I haven't had any of that kind of stuff at all... Now as I said, my dinners are my biggest problem at the moment. Tha plan for today is taco's... I don't have time to eat much through the day, so I tend to over-eat a lot at dinner and also weekends when I'm not restricted by my schedule.
I'll try using that app to track a full week including weekends to give you a better idea.
And I sincerely appreciate the time from those of you that replied!
JamesH - My advice is when you say frat, you provide a fucking frat
Pretty sure that OP qualifies as a FRAT for 99% of the OG.
Dude, you're 265. You can conservatively put away 3,500 cals per day and not gain weight. That's a lot of food.
But you're eating like a bird all day up until dinner. No wonder you come home and snack, you must be starving by the time dinner comes around. Before dinner you've only eaten 600 cals and only 20 grams of protein. And the protein is coming from protein bars which are low volume. You can eat 1.5 cans of tuna and get the same amount of protein as those protein bars and the tuna will be a hell of a lot more filling.
You gotta have a bigger lunch. You can't willpower all the way through dinner and then hope you don't go off the rails. Pick one lunch, protein, carbs, bag of baked chips if you like, and eat that everyday. You have to plan some of your meals. Not all but some.
Find protein sources you like and you can easily snack on at work. I eat a shit tom of cottage cheese usually with an apple.
Couple of thoughts and these are just my personal thoughts on what you've laid out.
You saying you will never see 210 lbs again is already you giving up. Not only is it doable, that should be your long term goal to shoot for. It may take a few years, but that's why you need to have goals. Getting down to 225ish like you said you would be happy with should just be your short term goal. These are important too.
Its too bad you are unable to squat or deadlift because those would be the two best exercises for increasing strength and putting a huge demand on your body to force adaptations, but I assume you can still do some variations of those types of movements such as lunges, front squats with maybe kettlebells or dumbells, split squats, kettlbell or dumb bell swings, one legged deadlifts. These should be your bread and butter strength lifts along with the overhead press, bench press, pull ups and rows.
Make sure you're doing them heavy. Don't be a bitch about it.
Its actually a good thing you are making gradual changes to your diet. Many people try to completely change everything at once and usually fail miserably. Like some other posters have stated, you can't look at the exercise and diet changes as temporary, they have to be the way you live your life. Seriously, this is the most important part. Its the most annoying thing I hear people say or do regarding their wellbeing.
Go watch some Jocko podcasts and adopt some of his philosophies on working out and getting after it. That guy gets me fucking pumped up every time. His idea of never actually planning for rest days because life will provide them for you is actually kind of genious in my opinion. Just get after it and refuse to accept medocrity or being a fatty as part of your life. You'll be dead in no time, do you really want to go out like a bitch. RAGE MOTHER FUCKER!
I haven't been able to post for a couple days, but I want to say thanks to those that replied. I lurk from my phone, but only post from the PC as this site is a train wreck on my phone.
I've been using the myfitnesspal app like acm5060 suggested and that thing is awesome. Didn't realize how easy something like that could be to use, and surprised at how much info it accesses, even has food info on specific stuff from restaurants here in my small town. Pretty impressed.
It's definitely changing how I'm eating, I never tried calorie counting because it seemed like a pain in the ass, but this is showing me that what I knew was unhealthy is far worse than I ever imagined when it comes to how much of your daily intake it can account for. I'm even finding myself pre-searching things when I have a choice to take the lesser of 2 evils.
My weekend was pretty awful though diet wise as I went to a fundraiser for a non-profit I'm a part of, and drank way too much and ended up at the buffet. I only drink a couple times a year, but when I do, it's bad.
Followed that with a day at an amusement park with the kids and there wasn't much choice in decent food, so yea... all in all, hopefully that little binge will be the last of its kind for a while.
Thanks again for the advice. Hopefully after a couple weeks of this app, I can start seeing the numbers change for the better.
That's awesome to hear!
I would never be able to do calorie counting without this app. It gets easier too if you eat the same stuff everyday. In fact, it kind of incentivizes eating the same stuff everyday because it's even easier to log.
Don't beat yourself up for going HAM this weekend. It happens. Don't have an uhealthy relationship with food. Enjoy it, own it, move one. It's gonna happen again. And it's not a big deal. Just contain it.
It's goofy, but knowing is half the battle.
How many cals you been eating per day? And how many grams of protein? On average, general approximation.
Weigh yourself once per week, same time every time, preferably in the morning after a pee. Log the weight in the app. Don't weigh yourself for another week. Then rinse and repeat.
Remember, progress won't be linear but should trend down over time.
acm5060 - That's awesome to hear!
I would never be able to do calorie counting without this app. It gets easier too if you eat the same stuff everyday. In fact, it kind of incentivizes eating the same stuff everyday because it's even easier to log.
Don't beat yourself up for going HAM this weekend. It happens. Don't have an uhealthy relationship with food. Enjoy it, own it, move one. It's gonna happen again. And it's not a big deal. Just contain it.
It's goofy, but knowing is half the battle.
How many cals you been eating per day? And how many grams of protein? On average, general approximation.
Weigh yourself once per week, same time every time, preferably in the morning after a pee. Log the weight in the app. Don't weigh yourself for another week. Then rinse and repeat.
Remember, progress won't be linear but should trend down over time.
On first day of the app I weighed 259lbs. The app has my goal set at 2560...
Thursday- 2815 (-255) 96g protein
Friday- 4505 (-1945) 121g <--- this is based on best guesses as I drank ALOT and logged what I could remember the next the morning after
Saturday- 2355 (+205) 81g I was better on calories, but this was a day spent at an amusement park, so the food was terribly unhealthy
Sunday- 1796 (+764) 74g Lazy day, didn't eat much, but didn't do much either. Recovered and took the kids bike riding.
Monday- 2356 (+204) 169g This was much higher on protein because I drink a shake after I workout, and didn't log that on the first day, and didn't work out Fri-Sun as was a chaotic weekend.
And after playing with that app, it looks like a lot of my intake can be tweaked to meet the goals as far as fats and sugars and such, but my sodium is off the charts. My average is apparently twice what my goal is and my potassium is pretty damn low as well.
I didn't eat any bananas which I normally do, and I did snack on a large bag of combos through the weekend, so curious to see how a subtle change like that affects these numbers for next week.
I kind of feel like an idiot with a new toy exposing me to knowledge that everyone else had access to but I was too lazy to see for myself.
I think, personally, that MyFitnessPal underestimates your daily caloric need.
A common calorie guide for losing fat is 10-12 cals per pound. For you that would be 2,600 to 3,120 cals per day (10x260 to 12x260). I'd rather see you on the upper end of those cals to start (call it 3,000) and then you can dial it down as the scale stalls. That's better than starting at 2,600 and then stalling and you having to do under 2,600 cals to continue progress. My recommendation would be to hit on or around 3,000 everyday and keep eating that until you stop seeing scale progress.
Now keep in mind that this scales down. So if you get to 240lbs, that's 10-12 cals for that new weight. So the new range is 2,400 to 2,900. So you will be reducing cals naturally.
I would also try to get your protein around 200 grams per day. Try to chew as much of that as possible. That will make you feel incredibly full and should reduce cravings you might have. Supplement with whey for 40-50 grams if you have to.
Regarding your sodium intake, I believe there's a tenuous relationship at best with health indicators on sodium alone. In other words, many in the past linked high sodium to high blood pressure and I think that relationship is busted. It's more likely that high sodium foods = high calorie foods = fat gain = arterial clogging = high blood pressure. But sodium absent excessive calories will prolly just bloat you and then you'll piss it out.
acm5060 - I think, personally, that MyFitnessPal underestimates your daily caloric need.
A common calorie guide for losing fat is 10-12 cals per pound. For you that would be 2,600 to 3,120 cals per day (10x260 to 12x260). I'd rather see you on the upper end of those cals to start (call it 3,000) and then you can dial it down as the scale stalls. That's better than starting at 2,600 and then stalling and you having to do under 2,600 cals to continue progress. My recommendation would be to hit on or around 3,000 everyday and keep eating that until you stop seeing scale progress.
Now keep in mind that this scales down. So if you get to 240lbs, that's 10-12 cals for that new weight. So the new range is 2,400 to 2,900. So you will be reducing cals naturally.
I would also try to get your protein around 200 grams per day. Try to chew as much of that as possible. That will make you feel incredibly full and should reduce cravings you might have. Supplement with whey for 40-50 grams if you have to.
Regarding your sodium intake, I believe there's a tenuous relationship at best with health indicators on sodium alone. In other words, many in the past linked high sodium to high blood pressure and I think that relationship is busted. It's more likely that high sodium foods = high calorie foods = fat gain = arterial clogging = high blood pressure. But sodium absent excessive calories will prolly just bloat you and then you'll piss it out.
^
Great post.
Try count grams instead of calories, OP.
Take your b/w in pounds adn keep your protein intake at that number, half that number for your carbs, and then half that number for your fats. See how you get on! ;-)
^^ I really appreciate the replies man. When it comes to this stuff, I am beyond ignorant. I've been trying to get more detailed with that app to get it as close as possible, and even started making my own stuff on there instead of a generic "turkey sandwich" Im putting it together one item at a time.
I honestly don't eat all that much/often but at times was totally over doing it in one sitting. Since using this thing, it's making me be more aware of exactly what I am eating, and also at times when I would normally feel guilty about eating again when I felt I shouldn't, I'm noticing I have more room under my goal to eat more since I'm dodging more of bad things that was killing me.
I'm going to try not weighing myself for 2 weeks until I can clean up my diet some more.
And as per one of the other posts, I have been trying to eat more earlier in the day. I think the biggest thing that's going to help me is portions... When I search something on that app and see what it's unit is, it shows me just how much I has taking in lol. Even the salads caught me off guard when I saw how much a couple spoons of dressing was bumping it up.
I wouldn't beat yourself up about feeling ignorant. Majority of people are ignorant to this stuff. I only started using it a few years ago and had the same eye opening experience you did. Before that, I had no clue.
I do a lot of the build up of foods as opposed to taking the predefined option as well. And you'll find that 60% of the stuff you eat everyday is pretty similar, so you can just quick add it in.
Yeah, salad dressing is killer. Heavy cals, for what it is. Bolthouse makes good yogurt based dressings that are tasty. I'm assuming you might be buying the salads though.
Paneras salads are pretty reasonable cal wise. And pretty tasty.
Eat all your cals! Don't feel guilty for eating all your cals.
Hey OP, I don't have much to add, but you mentioned tacos so I thought I'd throw this out there. Get one of those Old El Paso taco kits, but use ground turkey instead of ground beef. Fewer calories, less saturated fat but still delicious. And instead of sour cream, use plain Greek yogurt.
And since you're on an MMA forum I assume you're interested in the sport...why not give BJJ a shot? Three kids is tough though; I only have one (another on the way) and if you tell me you don't have time I know you're not just making excuses.
Hang in there buddy. Just some words of encouragement from a fellow old fat dude.
Lurker99 - ^^ I really appreciate the replies man. When it comes to this stuff, I am beyond ignorant. I've been trying to get more detailed with that app to get it as close as possible, and even started making my own stuff on there instead of a generic "turkey sandwich" Im putting it together one item at a time.
I honestly don't eat all that much/often but at times was totally over doing it in one sitting. Since using this thing, it's making me be more aware of exactly what I am eating, and also at times when I would normally feel guilty about eating again when I felt I shouldn't, I'm noticing I have more room under my goal to eat more since I'm dodging more of bad things that was killing me.
I'm going to try not weighing myself for 2 weeks until I can clean up my diet some more.
And as per one of the other posts, I have been trying to eat more earlier in the day. I think the biggest thing that's going to help me is portions... When I search something on that app and see what it's unit is, it shows me just how much I has taking in lol. Even the salads caught me off guard when I saw how much a couple spoons of dressing was bumping it up.
No problem, buddy.
Listen, with how many people are Personal Trainers/Dieticians etc nowadays, you could find a good close to you on Facebook/Twitter etc. That might be worth pursuing due to fitness in general being on a real high now.
Search for Crossfit groups that are local to you as well.
Remember! The first 6 months of your journey will see you make THE BEST gains, so take it seriously and get an expert or two in to help you. Do that and you will be a new man this time summer! ;-)
I was in a similar spot 2 Years ago. 6'1" 250lbs. 40yr old. 2 years later and I fluctuate between 195 - 205lbs. And am in great shape. Got a kick I the pants when I was invites to do some Spartan races, and couldn't live with being the least prepared guy on the team. Ended up being the most prepared.
Here's what I did. Paleo/keto style diet. Strict 80% of the time.
Strength day.... 3 days a week
In the beginning 30 min of motility and/or yoga. Later cut back on this for the sake of time.
A push, pull, leg, back, and abdominal exercise done in a circuit. Easy exercises on the scale of progression so I could do a lot fast. 20-50 reps depending on the exercise. Got to the point I could do 20-25 min work with no rest at a very high pace in maybe 3 months.
Cardio days......3 days a week.
Run at least 2-3 miles a moderate pace, or 30-45 on airdyne.
This kind of work will get you much better results than heavy lifting IMO. 