Aliens arrive on planet Earth

Aliens arrive on planet Earth. They have come in peace and surprisingly, they speak English.

All of the heads of government and religious leaders want to speak to the aliens, so they set up a meeting with our new visitors.

When it comes to the pope’s turn, he asks, “Do you know about our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ?”

“You mean JC?” responds the alien. “Yeah, we know him! He’s the greatest, isn’t he? He swings by every year to make sure that we are doing okay!”

Surprised, the pope follows up, “He visits every year?! It’s been over two millennia and we’re still waiting for his SECOND coming!”

The alien sees that the pope has become irate at this fact and starts trying to rationalize. “Maybe he likes our chocolate ice cream better than yours?”

The pope retorts, “Chocolate ice cream? What are you talking about? What does that have to do with anything?”

The alien says “Yeah, when he first visited our planet, we gave him a huge tub of chocolate ice cream! Why? What did you guys do?”


Oh, yeah - thanks, Jews…


I lightly chuckled.


Sounds like JC was…


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I laughed. I cried.

Ugh…we made him the biggest celebrity on the PLANET.

If JC comes back, what female will refuse to give him some pussy?

I pretty much arrive on scene and explain to the aliens I am the most intelligent biological lifeform on the planet and that the people surrounding them are attempting to manipulate, sabotage, and murder the aliens. I then use the aliens to destroy all my ideological enemies, commies, marxists, etc. and then me and the aliens make a peace agreement to where I rule the planet and allow them to import/export.

That is virtually the only way this scenario goes and it is guaranteed because during that scene I will in fact be the most intelligent person standing there.

You don’t think they will have access to your OG post history to prove otherwise?

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