ATTN: All UGers worth a damn

Who wants to hook me up with tickets to the UFC in Boston? This particular OG legend, with his ALMOST 10,000 posts, is not too proud to mooch. That's right. I have no money due to my quest to further my edumacation in hope of becoming even more of an insufferable know-it-all. But I do have an undying sense of my own righteous awesomeness, and the knowledge that few enough of you know who I am that I can beg for free shit without embarrassment.

I'll tell you all what - I know that giving me free tickets is going to be a hot commodity, so I am going to make this a contest. First person to pony up tickets gets to rename me for 6 months. That's right - you, yes you, could win the opportunity to mock and humiliate me for a full six months! At my current average rate of posting, that means almost 650 posts under whatever recockulous moniker you choose to inflict upon me.

Keep in mind that this is a limited time offer - UFC 118 is coming up in less than a month. Not that that an opportunity this sweet will sit on the table for nearly that long - BE FOREWARNED! Get on board with this sweet deal before DANA MAKES IT HAPPEN!


 meanwhile the UG is stacking paper

lol @ bails of 1 dollar bills

lol @ bails of 1 dollar bills

Quite a deal.

Bill Pharoni - Quite a deal.

No kidding! Can you believe that no one has jumped on this yet?

Oh shit, what an offer!

TTT for this magnificent opportunity!