(This is going somewhere MMA-related, just bear with me please.)
YOU NEED TO INVADE NORWAY NOW!!!!
Screw those 3rd world shitholes, they can all choke on Muhammad's dick for all I care. Sure, they got oil, but camels don't run on oil, so they gotta sell that shit to you anyway. And don't worry about the terrorists, they're gonna keep themselves busy blowing up each other fighting for power in the ensuing vacuum, they won't have time for no complicated 9/11 shit. Therefore I suggest another, better approach...
THE CASE FOR NORWAY!
We've got TONS of oil ourselves, we got fish, we're self-supplied with hydropower, we have modern infrastructure, and our proximity to Russia is strategically perfect from a military vantage point! It's the fucking jackpot I tell you!
BUT THERE'S MORE!!
Afghanistan has hardened Taliban fighters who's been at constant war since the early 80's, we've got practically NOTHING! Sure, we have conscription like any good socialist country, but it's basically just a bunch of pimply teenagers camping in the woods for 9 months or so. Everybody knows it's totally useless, but it's generally held to be good for morale and discipline and whatnot, which in reality is bullshit too, but when you've served your time you don't want to let the younger generations get away with not going through it since you had to, that just wouldn't be fair, and so it goes...
Anyway, it'd make Hitler's blitzkrieg against Poland look like the Vietnam war. And difficulties during the occupation? Fuck, as long as beer, TV's and lazyboys aren't outlawed you'll be just fine, trust me.
BUT WAIT, THERE'S EVEN MORE!!!
You don't need to have people to translate the gobbledygook of Arab peasants, you can talk to us directly! Every single Norwegian is born with a Hemingway-esque grasp of the English language - I'm willing to wager that including Norway as the 51st state would cause a significant increase in the overall literacy rate due to us compensating for all the retarded home-schooled trailertrash bums in the south.
BUT FUCK, WOULD YOU BELIEVE IT, THERE'S EVEN MORE THAN THAT!!!!!!!!
Taliban has these:
We've got these:
--
Could the case be any more compelling? No, of course not. But why would I, a good Norwegian citizen, advocate this apparently treasonous course of action you ask?
SEEING AS NORWAY CURRENTLY ISN'T PART OF THE US I DON'T GET SPIKE TV HERE, SO I HAD TO WAIT A WHOLE DAY TO DOWNLOAD TUF AND UFN 19, WHICH IN TURN FORCED ME TO STAY AWAY FROM ALL MMA-RELATED SITES FOR 24+ HOURS AND THAT SIMPLY ISN'T ACCEPTABLE!
Obama, you know what to do: Call back the troops, round up the military brass, start drawing up those lines and dots on the maps, restation the battleships, get those fighters in the air, GO ZULU TANGO ASAP!
WAT?
Just nuke it.
It won' help your Spike TV situation, but the Norway issue would be resolved.
WRONG FORUM ASSHOLE
Squared Circle - Just nuke it.That fails to take into account the compelling arguments presented above in the form of pictures imo.
It won' help your Spike TV situation, but the Norway issue would be resolved.
DirtyArmbar - WAT?
OldSchoolMike - WRONG FORUM ASSHOLE
THE ORIGINAL POST IS PERFECTLY MMA RELEVANT YOU DAMN SIMPLETONS
BROCKP4PNO1 -Squared Circle - Just nuke it.That fails to take into account the compelling arguments presented above in the form of pictures imo.
It won' help your Spike TV situation, but the Norway issue would be resolved.
Send the broads over and we'll consider not nuking you.
FOR MY FELLOW AMERICANS ONLY:
We'll still nuke them after they ship the broads.
Squared Circle - Send the broads over and we'll consider not nuking you.Drat!
FOR MY FELLOW AMERICANS ONLY:
We'll still nuke them after they ship the broads.
How about we nuke Arizona or Kentucky or something and then we ship every Norwegian over to take over the state? Fair compromise, no?
ATTN USA:
The Ivy League scumf*cks have taken over the country.
They have taken over the Treasury and the Federal Reserve and are destroying the US dollar as we speak.
America is turning into that family member that always asks for money, but will never be able to pay it back.
I like MMA as much as the next guy, but lets not completely ignore what is happening in the real world, people.
BROCKP4PNO1 -Why would you do that? you're better off in Chernobyl at that point, less radiation.Squared Circle - Send the broads over and we'll consider not nuking you.Drat!
FOR MY FELLOW AMERICANS ONLY:
We'll still nuke them after they ship the broads.
How about we nuke Arizona or Kentucky or something and then we ship every Norwegian over to take over the state? Fair compromise, no?
I would reconsider your genius idea.
evil veiled - ATTN USA:Don't you worry about that. Didn't I mention we got oil? We'll bail you out, as long as YOU GIVE US FUCKING SPIKE! =()#%(="!
The Ivy League scumf*cks have taken over the country.
They have taken over the Treasury and the Federal Reserve and are destroying the US dollar as we speak.
Also, tone it down a little, that's the kind of language that might attract 100 consecutive Eddie Bravo youtube posts in this thread, and nobody wants that, now do they?
tmr - Why would you do that? you're better off in Chernobyl at that point, less radiation.Well, fuck, let's put some anthrax in their drinking water then. Happy now?
I would reconsider your genius idea.
BROCKP4PNO1 -tmr - Why would you do that? you're better off in Chernobyl at that point, less radiation.Well, fuck, let's put some anthrax in their drinking water then. Happy now?
I would reconsider your genius idea.
That would please me.
edit
wasn't anthrax airbourne though?
edit2:
not necessarily
Anthrax commonly infects wild and domesticated herbivorous mammals which ingest or inhale the spores while grazing. Ingestion is thought to be the most common route by which herbivores contract anthrax. Carnivores living in the same environment may become infected by consuming infected animals. Diseased animals can spread anthrax to humans, either by direct contact (e.g. inoculation of infected blood to broken skin) or consumption of diseased animals' flesh.
Anthrax spores can be produced in vitro and used as a biological weapon. Anthrax does not spread directly from one infected animal or person to another; it is spread by spores. These spores can be transported by clothing or shoes. The dead body of an animal that died of anthrax can also be a source of anthrax spores.
The plan is a go!
It's airborne too, and hell, we could probably drop some other nasty shit in there too just for good measure.
Anyway, back to topic: Write your congressmen dear UG'ers. Let's get this show on the road!