Betaing the Bully

Just wanted to share a little S.P.E.A.R. success story with you...

A friend of mine brought his nine year old son to class to learn how to deal
with a neighborhood bully. We covered the 3 D's and when through S.P.E.A.R.
solutions to haymaker and tackle.

We did modified L.A.R.D. s, which, for non-TCMS/PDR folks, stands for Live action Response Drills. To keep it short and sweet, you are training using force that parallels the danger.

You can verbally de-escalate, stun and run, stun and control and in the most dire situations, stun and pummell...

I stressed control and de-escalation. We worked S.P.E.A.R. to headlock off a
haymaker and tackle. This was for stun and control.

We also worked Stun and pummell, in case things went south too fast for

A few days later the bully attacked Vincent (that's his name) and little
Vince used the S.P.E.A.R./headlock to perfection. He kept using the verbal
de-escalation, saying he didn't want to fight.

Vince's father saw the whole thing and said it worked like a charm.

A few days and 1 class later, the bully came back again, wanting to fight
again. This time Vincent used a little protective offense shot, followed by a
series of palm heels and then the headlock again.

It's been three weeks and no more problems from the bully.

Tony, you are a genius my friend.

Thanks again and take care,


Excellent Mikey..........chills running down my spine.

Today I was looking at an article on the MSN webpage that talked about bullying in schools and some of their do's and dont's.

There was some good advise in portions of the article but when I got to the paragraph about never using violence or aggression against a bully, I shook my head.

Sometimes certain degrees of violence are required, which is the core of the L.A.R.D. it develops appropriateness within a variety of scenarios and gives us permission to walk or to fight.

The psychological damage that can be done to a child or teenager that is bullied can be crippling.

Mike, you have done a lot for this person and I am sure the training you have provided will reap rewards for that child in the future. Truly awesome!!!

Robb Finlayson, PDR Coach

MIke, I am so prooud of you and your ablity to interpret and integrate the PDR drills no matter who your audience is...

Your teaching and this event will likely have a huge impact on this kid, one that we will not really notice until he's grown up.

Congrats!! YOure an asset to this team.


Awesome story. It not only shows what happens when someone learns the basics, stays focused, etc... but it also shows how Tony's system is so seamless from children, women, MA trainers, MMA fighters, Military to LEO. Mike, you've displayed one of the highest forms of mastery. You taught and someone learned and bettered themselves because of it. Enjoy moments like this, they last a lifetime ;)

Mitch Joel


Awesome story. Your ability as a Coach, and your dedication to the process shows in the BELIEF Vincent had. Not to mention the obvious level of skill you helped him develop. You're a credit to the Team and the whole PDR process!

I'm about to go out and train my own 'little warrior', Jeremy, who though a self-proclaimed pacifist, became his own 'bodyguard' a few weeks ago "when push came to shove" as Coach would say. This follows a long string of bullying that once saw him hospitalized! As we say in BTCMS, a real 'victim to victor' shift! When he relayed the story to me he told me he felt bad because he tried so hard to defuse it verbally and it didn't work. Thank's to Coach for the integrity of showing 'the opponent controls the fight' and that everything Jeremy did was because his opponent made it necessary.

Thanks for the post Mike, I'm nominating Vincent for 'SPEAR of the week'!


Mike: well done. This is what it's all about. Little Vince protected himself and won't begin to live as a victim, and maybe, just maybe the bully learned a valuable lesson and won't grow up to be a bully or worse!

Rob Gebhart

P.S. Is "resistance" keeping some of us from doing what Mike is doing? ;-)


Thanks for sharing this story. I have often wondered what a child, given the opportunity to develop within the PDR program, would be capable of when "push came to shove" as Phil mentioned. Coach's Three Dimensional Training Theory is a perfect fit for a child's development. The ability of a child to think a situation through as well as talk a situation through, can't be undervalued. How many children are ever given the chance to learn LIFE skills, that 'just happen' ;) to be connected to the ability to protect themselves?

Again Mike, thanks for sharing, it is inspiring to watch and learn from others that have taken their "Craft" to a new level.

"Don't show your students what you can do. Show them what they can do."-T.B. It just keeps driving home. :)


Tony and Team,

I am humbled by the adulation, but in reality the credit must ultimately go to Tony.

I think Mitch really nailed when he pointed out how seamless this system is, anyone can benefit from the widsom there...

Phil, I have re-dedicated myself to teaching my children and family. It is our duty to do so.

Tony, Without your guidance I'd still be in my garage, geting very good at the wrong things...

Take Care All,



Your post just goes to show the effectiveness of the SPEAR. It also shows that you are great Coach who can transmit the information effectivly. Good luck.

Strength & Honor,

Naso Karas


Tony gave you the guidance, but you did the teaching!
Don't sell yourself short.

Awesome job did a beautiful thing.


Awesome work, Mike. You have turned a victim into a VICTOR for LIFE! The psychological impact of all this will be quite profound, and reach far into his future years.