Boxing is pathetic

You people have no conception of how deadly these arts are, especially against woefully deficient fighters like boxers.
Case in point: I was walking down the street last week, minding my own business, when some half-drunk brawler came out of a bar with his entourage and bumped into me. He identified himself as Mike Tyson and let loose a stream of profanity. I can't repeat what he said for fear that there are women reading this, but I responded, "Watch where you're going, Gold-Tooth." Then he took a swing at me.

I simply ducked under his clumsy roundhouse, dropped right into the deadly horse stance, and straight-punched him to the solar plexus. While this clearly caused him pain, he was too well-muscled to be taken completely out by that (he is a boxer, after all). He came after me with a flurry of punches, but I remained in Zone 3 until I could sneak in a side kick that should have completely blown out his knee. Unfortunately, I just barely missed landing it right, so instead I immediately closed the distance, clinched, and drop seionage-d him.

I quickly achieved mounted position. Tyson was helpless under me, fruitlessly throwing ineffectual punches while I rained destruction on his head from above. But the guy has a jaw of iron, and my GnP wasn't taking him out fast enough. So, I let up a bit and allowed him to turn over, then quickly sank a rear naked choke on him and put him out in five. Needless to say, his entire entourage backed away scared, and I dusted myself off and continued down the street.

Silly boxers, thinking they can take on someone who has watched Rorion Gracie's "Basics" and Jean-Jacques Machado's "Becoming a Champion". They'll never learn.


No, no, AdrenalineJunkie, you don't understand. This isn't trolling for ratings, it's a response to "Kenpo strikes harder than boxing". Just trying to offer some real, live proof. Those boxers don't know the danger they're in when they go up against A Real Fighter®. What can you expect of people who name themselves after a type of underwear?





the zone 3 shit was great- 6.5

The horse stance is deadly right? Can it kill?

5 at best

There is some originality here and did have a nice eloquent flow - 6.5


"Watch where you're going, Gold-Tooth." Made it for me. 7.5

no, i think the deluded MartialArtsfan must be correct. Boxing sucks, right? Right?!