Critique (and help with) my fiction novel idea...

Make contributions and such, and if I use them I will put your SN in the credits.

 

 

Here we go:

 

A Guy gets himself into some shit.  Some serious fucking shit.  Goes through some more shit trying to undo the shit he got himself into.

 

In the end he finds himself after much trial and tribulation.  Shit happened he wasn't expecting but finally reconciled his life, bittersweet though the road was.  

 

Ok OG work your magic!!!

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Not gay enough. back to the drawing board, homo.

If this is for real...I'll help. Is this the synopsis for the book?

Anvilbear Hammerstrike -

If this is for real...I'll help. Is this the synopsis for the book?

Yes 

 

Every book

 

Ever

Since this is the og....

the man wakes up in a strange bed with a sore asshole and a huge hangover. The he realizes the "girl" he went home with from the bar has a bigger cock than he does.  

And.....

I'm gonna think about this later when I'm at the beach!

 

1 Like
phydeau -

Since this is the og....

the man wakes up in a strange bed with a sore asshole and a huge hangover. The he realizes the "girl" he went home with from the bar has a bigger cock than he does.  

And.....

In walks a man.  He's 6' 4" tall, 300 pounds, and black as the ace of spades.  He says "she spent the night with you like you asked.   Now it's time to pay.  That's $400.00.  Now."

bump

2 Likes

So a common man in uncommon circumstances...?

Now THAT is a great idea for a book!

From a writing perspective I think the best things you could do to improve a story are:

Have an animal narrate

Have a child & adult switch bodies

At the end find out it was all just a dream

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That's the ending to shawshank redemption

Then he sees dead people

Sounds like op is writing the script for the tenth installment of Backdoor Sluts

Been done too many times.....

 

need something original, like say:

guy is really good at something, but retires to live a normal life.  Something happens where the people he used to work for come to him and ask him to suit up because they need his help and there's never been a better (whatever he was).  He says something like "I don't do that anymore..as he looks to his family who is playing in the background"...but then something happens that gives him the motivation to take care of business one last time...:

 

you get the idea, something original that's never been done before 

What if he gets chased by the mob and the police and he's the only one who can clear his name?

Might be cool if it happened a long time ago in a galaxy far far away!

How bout this one op?

I've been holding on to this one for a few years now. I think it would make a decent transition to a movie. 

Title:

The White Meat

A slave plantation deep in the dark south, has a large group of slaves working the fields and the house, but no one has heard from the master, missus or children in a long time.

Plot overview: spirits and voodoo plague this lone plantation, where every new family of owners eventually becomes victims of the quiet and seemingly submissive slaves that hide a cannibalistic secret.

An out of state plantation owner, visiting the area comes across this remote sprawling estate and becomes enamored. Without deeper investigation, he finds out that there is no master/overseer. He quickly obtains his new investment and moves his whole family in, to take ownership and capitalize on the upcoming harvest. He doesn't know that he and his family will be the harvest.

 

Setting and Style: Set in the Deep South in the early 1800's, with bright colors and contrasts to show off the beautiful plantation. Slaves work the fields and home. All the slaves hum/sing old slave songs but all redone in minor keys. Very few smile or look up. Light will usually cast additional shadows keeping their faces from being seen but their eyes will always be shiny silvery or glow yellow. Night scenes will show the slave house with a deep bluish glow as seen from the masters bedroom. 

I haven't made the effort to actually write out the story, but I thought it might be worth doing if it hasn't been done already. 

The night was sultry ...

Throwin'Knuckles -
Im with the banned -

How bout this one op?

I've been holding on to this one for a few years now. I think it would make a decent transition to a movie. 

Title:

The White Meat

A slave plantation deep in the dark south, has a large group of slaves working the fields and the house, but no one has heard from the master, missus or children in a long time.

Plot overview: spirits and voodoo plague this lone plantation, where every new family of owners eventually becomes victims of the quiet and seemingly submissive slaves that hide a cannibalistic secret.

An out of state plantation owner, visiting the area comes across this remote sprawling estate and becomes enamored. Without deeper investigation, he finds out that there is no master/overseer. He quickly obtains his new investment and moves his whole family in, to take ownership and capitalize on the upcoming harvest. He doesn't know that he and his family will be the harvest.

 

Setting and Style: Set in the Deep South in the early 1800's, with bright colors and contrasts to show off the beautiful plantation. Slaves work the fields and home. All the slaves hum/sing old slave songs but all redone in minor keys. Very few smile or look up. Light will usually cast additional shadows keeping their faces from being seen but their eyes will always be shiny silvery or glow yellow. Night scenes will show the slave house with a deep bluish glow as seen from the masters bedroom. 

I haven't made the effort to actually write out the story, but I thought it might be worth doing if it hasn't been done already. 

Sorry bro.. stopped reading after the first sentence. 


This!


I need to know what happened/happens to Andrew!


I mean, what's with the car crash??


Is this really his life, or WTF??


 


Keep it coming Knucks!!

Then some bato shows up ( cheech marin) and says....." orale vato...wasss happening" ......

cont'

Can this be the random pulp / noir prose thread? Then you OP as the editor will piece it all together and we will win an Edgar 

1 Like