Divorce Custody Question

So I have another thread going, but I need insight to this one specific question. We are seeking no support from one another, agreeing on possessions and debt, also agreeing on joint custody. To keep costs down and because we are both agreeing on all the terms, instead of lawyers we are using completecase.com which is supposedly legit.
She has the documents printed up and I've looked them over. I have no issue with anything it says other then that legally, one parent has to be named as sole custody parent. It makes mention of joint custody in other parts, but this one line is why I am refusing to sign anything at this point.

We have the joint custody schedule worked out already, but she says legally one parent has to be named sole even in a joint custody agreement. Any help? Phone Post 3.0

Get a lawyer.

ptper - Get a lawyer.
This. Even if it's just to review and explain it. Would be well worth the couple hundred bucks. Phone Post 3.0

dhughes - For the love of god please have an attorney at least review it. Phone Post 3.0
I had a pretty strong feeling most would be telling me to get a lawyer. I'm not opposed to having an attorney look things over, I'm was just concerned he/she will try to convince me I can't do this without there further representation. Please don't take my words as being dismissive, I'm for lack of better words pretty vulnerable right now. Phone Post 3.0

Get a lawyer. You can't hear this enough.

Even if it's amicable and she's going to blow you three times a week just to help you distress. Get a lawyer. Phone Post 3.0

De-stress Phone Post 3.0

not sure what state you are in but in NJ that's BS

 

in NJ there is no "sole custody"  unless one has their parental rights removed by court order

 

there is a term "residential" custody but  even in a case like ours were we have residential custody of our child 100% and she only sees her natural mother once ever month or 2 for about 3-4 hours it's still legally "joint custody"  because the mother still has parental rights even though based on our court order she only gets to see the child under the circumstances we dictate and when we dictate.

TFK_figure8 - 
dhughes - For the love of god please have an attorney at least review it. Phone Post 3.0
I had a pretty strong feeling most would be telling me to get a lawyer. I'm not opposed to having an attorney look things over, I'm was just concerned he/she will try to convince me I can't do this without there further representation. Please don't take my words as being dismissive, I'm for lack of better words pretty vulnerable right now. Phone Post 3.0


again i'm not sure about your state but we went and talked things over with a lawyer and paid a 200 dollar consultation fee and got advice.



 



we could have paid a retainer and would have if things didn't go our way in court but as you can see in my previous post they did so we didn't need to pursue it further

Sorry, meant to say I'm in Illinois. Phone Post 3.0

It looks like she would have sole physical custody and you both would have joint legal custody.

 

My paperwork was drawn up the same.

TFK_figure8 - Sorry, meant to say I'm in Illinois. Phone Post 3.0


i'd say at a bare minimum



 



call a lawyers office and ask them if they do custody document reviews and if so how much.  make sure you let them know you aren't looking to retain them but just get their legal opinion and clarify any details of the court document for you.

Sorry you are going through this man...

Everyone is right...get a lawyer...of all the issues you can't risk any gray area, custody is number 1 on the list and second ain't close. 

You might, as is understandable, think "I can't imagine this becoming a problem in the future..." but to be blunt, you didn't imagine getting divorced etc.  All it takes is, you start dating someone and she gets mad...OR...she starts dating someone you don't approve of having around your kids...or any other of a hundred different things and that "sole custody" thing is back in your face. 

Maybe it's specific to your state? Where are you?

I know that here in CT, you can really say "Joint Custody" and it's an even split.

You may want it to read joint physical and legal custody

As one who has been down this road including an incredibly expensive custody battle 10 years after the divorce I can only echo what others have said ... get a lawyer.

I'm Canadian but there was no sole custody in our divorce. There was joint custody and our agreement even laid out what that meant.

The clearer it is the better it will be for both of you down the road. Phone Post 3.0

Never_rolled - 

Basically it means one parent has the ultimate authority. I am not sure if that can be both. As pointed out you need to consult an attorney.

 

I am in the middle of this myself. Right now I have temp. full custody. Ex wife isn't allowed to see our son. We are going for the full monty because ex wife is incapable of making adult decisions. Your situation seems very different. Good luck and I am glad for you that this is amicable.



did she bag a cabbie?



 



is that why you are so anti taxi cabs?



 



 



 



i kid i kid.



 



custody battles suck. even amicable ones

Yeah, I think she's trying to railroad you if she printed the documents and she tells you "one person must have sole custody". I don't know of any state that has no form of joint custody. She's trying to sucker you on the most important issue. Sole custody also means Child Support, which can be 30-40% of your take home pay even if you have the kid half the time.

Find a colaborative lawyer or divorce mediator. They can help you while also keeping it amicable. Phone Post 3.0

If it means nothing, then why doesn't she list you a sole custody Phone Post 3.0