Family or loved one an addict or user?

What did you do to navigate through the mountain of lies, broken promises, and damaged caused by the user/addict?

Did you break away completely or separate yourself emotionally and provide reasonable support?

I've had to cut ties with friends that were addicts for those reasons. You can try to help all you want. Decades ago, I had a friend locked in my basement for days going through withdrawal. Eight days later he went out and bought four bundles of h. Asshole.

Addicts don't quit unless they want to.

Loved ones, that's different. Much harder and in some cases impossible to just walk away from. Been there too, many years ago. Not fun. I don't envy anyone in that position.

if it was up to me i'd have dumped my sister in mexico

 

but my parents paid for 3 rehabs and she was stillk doing heroin

when she did quit she did it on her own with lots of methadone for years

Break away completely until they take steps to help themselves. Otherwise it's just a waste of time and energy. 

Have one fighting a cocaine and crack problem.  Told me he doesnt want to stop because lifes boring without drugs.  That hurt to hear.  He lives in another city which makes it easier to deal with.  Hes 55 though.  Not sure what i can do about it.  Have already tried to intervene but he doesnt want to go to rehab and thinks he doesnt have to do 12 step programs as theyre prescribed.  Hes "got this"

Grown ass man needs to figure it out himself.  4 years ago he had about 600k with 300k interest in a business.  Last year he called and asked to borrow 1k.  Hurt to say no.

Also have a niece thats a heroin addict.  She at wanted to quit and has been sober for several years now. 

They both live in Portland, a terrible (or great, depending on how you look at it) town to be n addict in.

Have had/ lost other friends to drugs over the years.   Hard to watch.  Several are dead from them.  Drugs suck kids.  Stay in school.

If you can’t get them to acknowledge the problem then it is completely maddening to deal with them. I know I can’t fix the problem and I know it’s not my fight but it’s hard to walk away.

Thank you HighInside

Never easy. 

Youngest sister.  My mom is the enabler.

Their perception of the world is so toxic that they're OK with being the world's most selfish person.

I hate her, but I wish I didn't. 

Majority of my family and some close friends are addicts of one kind or another.  Alcohol, opiates, meth.  Most broke away from me on their own.

I have always welcomed them back.  I am glad my entire immediate family are doing well now.

EFM -

Have one fighting a cocaine and crack problem.  Told me he doesnt want to stop because lifes boring without drugs.  That hurt to hear.  He lives in another city which makes it easier to deal with.  Hes 55 though.  Not sure what i can do about it.  Have already tried to intervene but he doesnt want to go to rehab and thinks he doesnt have to do 12 step programs as theyre prescribed.  Hes "got this"

Grown ass man needs to figure it out himself.  4 years ago he had about 600k with 300k interest in a business.  Last year he called and asked to borrow 1k.  Hurt to say no.

Also have a niece thats a heroin addict.  She at wanted to quit and has been sober for several years now. 

They both live in Portland, a terrible (or great, depending on how you look at it) town to be n addict in.

Have had/ lost other friends to drugs over the years.   Hard to watch.  Several are dead from them.  Drugs suck kids.  Stay in school.

This is how MyPillow happened...

Seriously though, sorry to hear that. Been in a similar spot. Shit ain't easy.

jju - 

Majority of my family and some close friends are addicts of one kind or another.  Alcohol, opiates, meth.  Most broke away from me on their own.

I have always welcomed them back.  I am glad my entire immediate family are doing well now.

It’s good to hear something positive. Redemption.

Yes, I have. I don't let them around my wife. I also don't give them money, but have a standing offer to pay for treatment whenever they want. None of them ever take that offer and they choose to keep distance from me because they know I'll call them on their bullshit every time.

That's the only way I can make sure their illness doesn't hurt others in my life.