Been on the road to recovery as an addict. I'm 20 years old. Coming close to 40 days clean. But here is my fucking problem, Everything can be going great, and all of a sudden I'll get really depressed, and it completly de-rails me. I get knocked off track. I haven't used. Life throws every curveball it can at you to challenge you through this shit. Every time I get back up, I get kicked in the balls again. It sucks. lol. I got a gym membership, got a bike with the little money I had left, and it fucking breaks. (root 12 is helping me though). I think I have extra money, so to make sure I don't have the option of relapsing I pay my gym membership a month ahead, broke. This morning, phone shut off because I forgot about a payment arrangement. I have 2 family members that support what I am going through, and although unintentional, I still find a way to make the one I'm staying with want me out. (I do pay rent here and am treated like a normal room mate) And I have no other options as far as places to live.
I edited this because people were commenting about my attitude. What's fucking me is that my attitude is in the right place, but then these random fits of depression set in and I self destruct. It's frusterating. This isn't me, I was never depressed or suicidal.
Venting done. Thanks for your time OG.