Good one line slams for my friends

I play fantasy football and write a weekly article about the games and the players in my league. I try to make fun of them weekly with this like:

hes gayer than cum in a mustache

He'd be the owner of a European wax center specializing in the Bro-zilian style of wax for young men. 

You know, just make fun of my friends. I'm always looking for material. In our league we have a very short Mexican, a tall fat Italian, a man pretty guy, a tall lanky Muslim and the other six are typical beer drinking white guys. 

Can the OG help a brother out?

your mom!

Sounds like you've got a bunch of law abiding white guys and a couple of Inmates

Look at reddit under the /roastme comments.

There are some there that really go above and beyond. Every time I think it couldn't be funnier, something else pops out. There are some mean, cruel people there having a ton of fun.

I'd say come up with your own, but this would be a perfect place to steal from.

I've been coming up with my own for years and it's getting stale. I need help!!!


thanks for the suggestion!

Ha  that's quite a group you have there 

village people 2.0

Yo mama was in Brothers on Mothers 6!
Yo nana was in Trannies on Grannies 4!
Yo dick's so short, you pee on yo nuts!
Yo sister goes down faster than Glass Joe!

I fucked your wife!

groundfighter2000 - your mom!
Damn it. Came here to write those two words.

Tell the short Mexican to go back to his God damn country.

The jerk store called...

Tell the Mexican that Trump kicked so many of his people back over the fence it caused an earthquake.