Have To Go To Jersey, FML

I have to go to Jersey in June for a week. Fortunately, my company is flying me, but I have to fly into the shithole New York City.

Should I get my affairs in order before the trip?

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Seriously, though, Ill be in South Plainfield. Is there anything to do or see after work? Or should i just chill in the hotel?

Jug handles! Jug handles everywhere!

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You flying into LGA?

I think south Plainfield kind of sucks but overall NJ is great out that way.

You should fly in and out of Newark if you can. The airport sucks ass but it’s like 15 min from Plainfield.

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Company picnic in Camden?

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Yeah, that’s kinda what I was getting after.

If he’s flying in through LGA or JFK, the traffic is likely gonna be dogshit getting to S Plainfield.

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Not sure yet. I think either there or JFK

Thats what im afraid of

Yeah, you’ll either be fucked on the Belt Pkwy or fucked through the Bronx.

No danger though. Just traffic. And churro ladies on the side of the road.

Don’t buy the churros though. Trust me.

NJ is basically just like the rest of middle America except slightly worse in almost every way. But if youve never been to NYC, there are unique things to do there that you should try, like Statue of Liberty, Central Park, Washington Square Park, Rockefeller Center, Katz’s Deli, St Patrick’s Cathedral.

I havent lived there in a long time and have less than zero desire to ever go there again, but its big and there is stuff to see and do. It sounds like you will probably get robbed, assaulted, and/or murdered there these days, but thats just part of the experience.

You trying to get the man killed?

Might as well send him to Hunts Point. At least then he can get some bad pussy before he dies lol.

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Can you still buy “mescaline”/strychnine there like I used to in the 80s? At least then he wont care when they are murdering him.

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I cannot picture you buying mescaline lol.

But no, I don’t think they sell it there anymore.

Yeah, I’ve never been to New York and alsays said Id never go. Im from the south but with the new company im with this may be happening from time to time

So much for this being a great career move

You should take a day trip to the boardwalk in Keansburgh!

We used to hang there a lot. Rastas and hacky sacks and all that bullshit. I went to the gay Halloween Parade in Greenwich village a few years in a row on acid as well.

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creamation or burial op