How the rules were written

Eye pokes and nut shots happen every fight. It is the most effective natural self defense. But you have a limit of 3 or 4 if you are a good talking American. 


The fence grab is moderately illegal and will get you a point deducted immediately if used effectively. We can't risk our wrestlers missing the big finisher slam



The knee when the opponent is technically down is a hard foul and you will lose 1 or 2 points perhaps the fight as well. Karate just doesn't work against wrestlers remember remember that. 


The soccer kick is so illegal just an attempt will get you immediately disqualified. Might get you deported too and your licence revoked


Biting can be used to escape Japanese engineered submission holds such are the arm bar or rear naked choke. Or as they like to call it Suburu sushi and rare Kobe beef. Oh I almost forgot to mentioned if your black it's the most illegal thing since Holyfields name. 



The 12 to 6 elbow is illegal because it attacks in such an angle that gravity drops heavy granny arms into the eyeball of a good big eyed American



Other elbows are used best against shifty eyes commies that deserve you be locked in a cage against American muscles. Perfectly legal after a good ole takedown. 


Pile drivers and head spike is illegal but its also American. So no warning. 


I'm Big John McCarthy and after speaking to John McCain who also has a wonderful name, and we approve these rules and will ignore Joe Rogan, the fans and even my drunken self because it's written on paper. And paper don't erase like Micheal Jackson's skin.

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