How would a redneck describe sex? (Contest)

I will buy a blue name for whoever I think gives the best answer.  If it happens to already be a bluenamer I will give you credit and a VU, but I'll go to my favorite mudnamer answer for the blue gift.


Rules and terms:


-it has to be plagiarism (however, feel free to post hilarious shit from other sources.)


-The deadline for this contest is either the end of this week OR until this thread gets at least 25 mudname replies (not counting mine)


There are some funny m'fuckers on here, so let's hear it!


May the best man win!

I always call it poking the pee hole. But I'm not a redneck. I'm white trash.


Bumpin' uglies.

Like kissing your sister 

Family time

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Nekkid as a jaybird.

Grinnin like a possum.

Pants so tight I could see her religion.

Well, that just dills my pickle.

licked the red off her m + m.

She sucked it like a golf ball through a garden hose.

Enter-duced my hot dog to her hallway.

She tried to run, I was able to Ketchup


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"pumpkin" especially around the holidays

In today's climate you're really going out on the edge with this one OP!  Brave man.


I No Kung Foo -

In today's climate you're really going out on the edge with this one OP!  Brave man.

Seriously this.


We like to bury the Ole Weasel in the Mole hole 

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God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve

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Bajingo noodling


Making the Beast with Two Backs

What we do in the dark

Letting the syrup out of aunt jemima

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It's when ya take yer ol' trouser snake in ya hand, smack yer cousin in her dick licker for a bit while ya' stir around in her bearded clam, get dat sumbitch steamin'. Then ya take that there one eyed Willy and cram dat fucker up on in that there little sweetie pie. Ya gotta pound away like yer diggin' a fence post hole, get that baby batter up in there nice and good, 12 years ya finally got somebody else what fer to make the tatter salad fer the family reunion!!!!

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Making siblings.

Fillin' out the family wreath.


Cousins with benefits 

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Crabdangle tango

Mississippi mudboggin

Slop slappin'

Slaw doggin'

Ya see this plug boy? The male end goes into the female end. Do you understand? The female end is like a woman's area and the male end is like the man area... 

Any questions? Go ask your mother.