Hulk vs Yoda

Yoda is quietly tending to his swamp patch when the Hulk stomps in from an inter-dimensional rift in space and challenges Yoda. Yoda, in his old age, had left his lightsaber in his hut and must face the Hulk without the weapon.

Who wins?

It would be a lot like when TC got laid by the fish.

Much as I like Yoda, this match-up bodes ill for him.

Yoda, 0:04 by anything he wants.

Throwing a lightsaber and cutting Hulk in half, mind-raping Hulk, dropping a tree on Hulk, anything.

The he turns back to his poridge "Funny, big green fellow was he."


i dont think yoda could mind-rape hulk, hulks pretty resistant to psychics. and we know for sure that tree-dropping doesnt phaze him. also the setup mentioned that yoda doesnt have his lightsaber. personally i dont think yoda can win this one. maybe hope to survive, but thats pretty much it.

yoda, by force throwing the hulk into outer space.

the madder hulk gets, the stronger hulk gets.... that being said he still needs air to get mad.

Yoad isn't sending anybody anywhere. He's tough, but even w/ the light saber he's done.

I am disappointed in you guys. 30 years of jerking of to star wars and you think that because yoda left his lightsaber in his hut that he is weaponless.

Hello? did you guys even watch the movies? Yoda would use the force to grab the lightsaber from his hut, Then he would attempt to plunge it into the hulk who would then swat yoda away like a fly.

Do either of them have mullets?

If he could fly his lightsaber to his hand he should be all right. If Wolverine's claws can cut the Hulk (which they shouldn't, but apparently do), it seems like a lightsaber should be able to cut him in half with a flick of the wrist.

drowning a poor tortured soul like the hulk is a one-way ticket to the dark side

Nah, Yoda would use the jedi mindtrick to soothe Hulk and then give him his bugporrige

ROFL @ bugporrige

Lol Kage is correct

Only way Yoda could win is with Jedi mind trick and I don't know if that would work. Even with his light sabre Hulk would smash him with a 100 ft rock or something.

LMAO at the "Jedi mind trick + 'bugporrige' " scenario.

But this would only work if Hulk was not enraged.

Yoda ain't levitating sh!t.....He had to REALLY concentrate to lift the X-Wing and it took forever to get the force thing going.......then it tok him forever to move the ship.

Hulk won't give him time for that. I think Hulk would actually eat least the Ultimate version would w/out a doubt.

i doubt the ultimate version of hulk would eat yoda. yoda would be all like 'hmmmm. hulk? this man, vader, is he. hulk likes to diddle men, he says. let him get away with that, will you?' then hulk would jump from dagobah to coruscant and pull whats left of vaders face off his skull before taking a massive dump on the executor and its crew

he'll get him eventually if they tussle enough. Yoda WILL tire and slow eventually. Hulk won't.

First off Yoda doesn't work all that hard to lift the x wing. Second he was only a short time removed from his death at this point.

Third they wouldn't fight. Not live to 900 years old does Yoda if fight all green strangers Yoda tries.

If anybody is smart enough to chill hulk out it would be Yoda. Then Yoda would help him reconcile the two sides of his personality.