I'm down in the dumps

Having problems with my kid. He is causing a ton of trouble at his mom’s house and at school. He hates school with a passion and is always going to the nurse or going to the counselor and making up lies to try to get sent home from school.

Well apparently he went to the nurse and lied and said he was peeing blood. He got sent home and taken to the hospital, then admitted he was lying to get out of school. Then the school called in DCS because of his lie being about his pecker.

I have asked him so many times why he hates school so bad and he just says he wants to be home and he’s miserable. I think it’s because he is a little behind and it makes him feel dumb. He has a brain disease and it makes it really hard for him to retain info. He’s not dumb by any means. Smart as a whip. He’s awesome at math, but he’s horrible at reading.

I feel horrible and wish I could help him but I don’t know what to do to get him to like school more. I feel like I’m sending him to prison when I send him back to his mom for the school week.


Incentives for reading will pay off

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I read with him. I buy these cool little superhero books and books about animals and stuff. Maybe it’s time for some new ones and ole dad needs to focus more on the school work and less on the play fights.

Also his little ass is in big trouble for all the lying. His fuckin mom hid it from me, and only told me about it today because DCS will be calling me tomorrow.


Don’t punish him for lying. It won’t change the behavior or address the cause. And it will make him less likely to tell you what the cause is anyway.

Don’t buy books, use the library. My wife get a load of books every other week from the library. She also gets movies and occasionally video games. All for free and constantly new material to keep the kids interested. It has paid dividends to date.


Sorry to hear your family is experiencing tough times K Jr, at least you are a real man involved in raising his son and not a man child who would see him as a burden that gets in the way of buying drones and lawn mower engine powered bicycles!

How old is your son? Do you think he could be getting bullied. What kinda brain disease does he have, think that could account for his behavior? Just know your forum bros are here for you!

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Not everyone is meant for school. Start him on hard labor and I mean hard not some bullshit housework. Get him a manual labor job. He’ll be begging to go back to school after one day.


if he likes Super Heroes then use that to inspire Intelligence. Many kids only notice the Fighting/Action but show him how pursuit of knowledge/intelligence are a big part of what makes Bruce Wayne, Tony Stark, Peter Parker and others so amazing.

and Clark Kent, you have to love reading/books/writing/language to be a great reporter and having such intelligence is a real Super-Power! Knowledge gives us the ability to improve ourselves.


@Cheddar_Man I don’t want to go into details on his brain thing. I am not great at explaining it. Basically he has some type of growths in his brain and they effect his memory, but they do not effect his behavior.

I do worry about him being bullied but he says this is not the case.

Does he seem like the kinda kid that would be bullied. Makin up lies to get outs school seems extreme just cause you think its boring.

A buck a book, let him pick.

While I do understand your sentiment @bedbug (shrek jr), I already told him that his Xbox is mine now. So I can’t go back on that or else he’ll think I’m a bitch.

Maybe I’ll slack off on any other punishment for the time being.


Thanks raskal, I’ll keep it in mind.

When I was a kid I read a book so my mom would let me get my ear pierced. All the kids at school called me a faggot so I had it taken out. But at least I was a literate faggot!

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@Cheddar_Man I don’t think so. He’s a reasonably good looking kid. I buy him nice clothes and dress him nice. I’ve taught him good grooming habits so I know he ain’t the stinky kid. Plus he’s pretty tough and he’s a year older than all the kids in his class. So I’m pretty sure he would kick a first graders ass if need be.

Your kid sounds like me as a kid, just a little skewed.

I sucked at math. I was great at reading. So he’s like me. Just in the opposite direction.

That’s fucking FINE dude. He doesn’t like school. Neither did I. Neither did millions of other children. That’s okay. 100%.

Fuck CPS getting involved. That’s government overreach. Unacceptable. Unjustifiable.

Your kid is likely different. So am I. So are millions.

You get to know him better than anyone else. So… you foster the good in him. Find his sharp points, and hone them.


I want to make a joke about of course he has trouble learning because look who his dad is but I don’t want to talk bad about your son. That’s more of a joke on you. Now that I got that out of the way, I wish I had some advice. When I was a kid I was the exact same way as far as not liking school. My problem was more that I was ahead though and got bored. There is nothing anyone could have done that would have made me like school. It just wasn’t for me. The one thing that made me ok with going to school was that was where my friends were. Does he have friends at school? School can be hellish for kids when they are a loner and they feel like they are an outcast.

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The whole cps thing is crazy though. Kids lie all the fucking time. I would be very angry about that

I was like that. I’m dyslexic but it only comes out in weird ways, it’s not like people think it is- I don’t see letters backwards or anything…
But I hated every single second of school and would do about anything to get out of going or to get sent home. That got me branded as “one of the bad kids”.
I’m not stupid (easy, now) and I have 2 college degrees. But I absolutely hated everything about school as a kid and eventually dropped out because I was so far behind.

Get on top of this.

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Sounds like the kid has a dad who cares. That means he is not a lost cause. Look inward, see if there’s anything you can hold yourself accountable for but don’t create something out of guilt, just be honest and don’t be afraid if you come up with nothing.

I know it can be extremely tough sharing custody and if you and the mom do not get along, it can make things really difficult. I do not know how old your kid is, but even young kids can manipulate parents and learn how to play each of them including how to play them off each other.

If you are able to, reach out to the mom, start out being super civil, maybe congratulate her on something she’s got going on in her life, and then say something like “well, I’m worried about our son and just wanted to talk to you about it and get your take on things, run some ideas I have by you and see if we can co-parent with the purpose of fixing this current issue”.

That’s assuming your ex is reasonable, which I understand might not be the case.

You’re one of this sites best posters not only because you contribute but you are really positive all the time even if you’re ragging on someone you do it in a way that’s funny and not out of malice so I am sure your real life personality is positive as well. That’s a great trait to have and I’m sure you care so…

Remember parenting ain’t easy, you’re going to need moments to vent and “reset”, and just understand that every parent gets stressed so don’t feel guilty about having to deal with problems.

Best of luck to you homie!