Just Found Out My Son is Gay

He was over at my house visiting and we were having a good night. He was pushing his daughter on the swing in my backyard and I thought it was a picture perfect moment so I grabbed his phone off the table to snap a pic. Bad idea. 

 

I notice the thumbnail of the first picture in his album seems to be a naked black guy and, thinking it was some joke meme or something, click on it.  It was a nude photo of that dude from Black Panther. Wtf. I swipe to the next picture and it’s a dude with jizz all over his beard. Now my heart drops and I continue to swipe in shock–bad idea again. Just full on hardcore buttfucking and hairy dudes 69ing. 

 

Suddenly my son snatches his phone out of my hands. He’s seen me looking at it and has run over to stop me but it’s too late. He was bright red, embarrassed, and extremely pissed. His daughter can tell something weird is going on so I get up and start jokingly swinging a fly swatter at her and he flies into a rage screaming “don’t you fucking hit my daughter” and starts limp-wristedly windmilling at me while shrieking like a liberal.  Obviously he was just overcome with emotion because I’d just found out he swallows cum in truck station bathrooms; I wouldn’t harm a hair on my granddaughter’s head. 

I was able to subdue him pretty quickly and without even really upsetting the little girl. I think he’s been taking transition hormones or something because he felt very frail and weak. He ran to his Subaru Outback crying and wailing and I went to take a drink of my beer too fast and chipped my fucking tooth. 

 

The OG has always been wise. What does everyone suggest I do about my possibly transitioning, pillow biting, weak, sissy, cum dumpster nancy of a son?

 

9 Likes

My only regret is that I have but one vote up to give.

2 Likes

LMAO

9/10 because of “chipping your tooth on the beer can” hahaha!

3 Likes

Lmfao. Bravo. You hooked me perfect at the fly swatter

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Well done. 

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Great job, scooter. Nice.

Lol

Hahahahah.... Nice! 

![](upload://sY4ggeHGcAdgXSnxRU9mMWakJVE.gif)

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A rare beauty of a spin, well done. 9/10

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Perfectly spun

Hahah totally had me going, the gradual transition into a obv spin was great.

Damn!!!!!

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Is this the new 1998 undertaker meme?!

https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/the-undertaker-threw-mankind-off-hell-in-a-cell

https://www.cnet.com/news/reddit-memes-hell-in-a-cell/

![](upload://aPNq46H2uOzEtfKmYtmZC1mA54N.gif)

In for historical purposes.

10/10 few sentences in and was like the spin has arrived.

Do a spin from the fly swatters perspective next!

2 Likes

10/10

10

Lol

10/10