Larry Csonka was only a fullback because if he isn't at least five yards off the line of scrimmage, his penis would be offsides.
Larry Csonka only wore a helmet to protect other players from making contact with his bare head.
They only named the Super Bowl trophy after Vince Lombardi because there were no metal sculptors capable of making a trophy worthy of Csonk. One existed in the fourth century. He was a direct ancestor of Larry Csonka.
When Larry Csonka is at the supermarket he smashes all of his items into one big item so he can go through the 10 items or less line. Which is rather unecessary considering they are too terrified to make him pay anyways.
Larry Csonka saved a bunch of money on his car insurance....without switching to geico.
Where did this come from? I know a bit about Zonk. While he's one tuff dude, none of it is true. It's a shame he had his fixed nose on his HOF bust.
Larry Csonka just got a roundhouse to the head by Chuck Norris it is rolling down the road somewhere
larry csonka just picked up that head, carried it for 38 yards, and stiffarmed chuck norris into oblivion as he entered the end zone. The end zone is the term of endearment csonk uses for Chuck Norris' wife.
if you make direct eye contact with zonk you go blind. our brains alter his apperance to something less awesome to protect us from going mad. those who have seen the true zonk say his visage is similar to a flame engulfed grizzly mating with a unicorn.
the deaf gladiator on american gladiator only went deaf because they foolishly thought zonk needed a microphone. if you had put your tv on mute, you woulda still heard zonk.