Monkey Steals the Peach is a technique originating from Kung Fu monks, or maybe it was Ninjas, in which the adept drops low to avoid an upper body attack, reaches out and upwards with a claw, and then closes the claw with crippling effect on the attackers, ummmm, peach. From there, pull.
Even before the advent of the Internet, it was a martial arts meme. If you owned the book above as a teenager, kudos. If you still have it, don’t tell anyone.
The technique was also used to notable effect in Kata Dante, The Dance of Death: “What you are about to witness below is without doubt the most savage and terrifying self-defense form known to man. It is composed of fifty-seven of the deadliest poison hand techniques ever devised, each one of which is guaranteed to kill, cripple, or maim any attacker. It is not for the squeamish, nor the weak of heart.”
The crazy thing is, Monkey Steals The Peach actually worked.
Fatally.
What Happened
Vietnam’s Tuoi Tre News has the story.
A man in the southern Vietnamese province of Tien Giang died after a fight with his estranged wife on Sunday, during which the woman reportedly launched numerous attacks, including aggressively squeezing his testicles.
Le Kim Khai, 53, died of suffocation en route to hospital on Sunday after his face turned purple. His wife, 55-year-old Phan Thi Kim Chuong, is being held for questioning, Tien Giang police said on Monday.
On Sunday night, Khai arrived at his wife’s home, only to see the doors locked with Chuong and one of their two daughters refusing to let him in.
Khai responded by taking out a hand-saw in order to cut the lock open, but as soon as he got into the house, the separated couple got into a fierce quarrel, which quickly turned violent.
The husband was the first to use his fists, and repeatedly beat his wife despite the daughter’s desperate attempts to stop him. After the daughter was also eventually beaten, the wife shouted out for help.
However, before any neighbors could respond, the wife grabbed the testicles of her husband, and pulled him down to the ground. Chuong then jumped on the man’s belly, her hands not releasing his private parts.
Chuong was still squeezing her husband’s balls when she finally managed to call the police.
After crushing his testicles for about five minutes, Chuong agreed to stop, as advised by neighbors who had finally arrived at the scene.
At this point Khai had already lost consciousness and died as he was rushed to hospital. An autopsy revealed that he died of tracheal effusion, with food stuck in his windpipe, leading to suffocation.
Chuong told police she had been repeatedly assaulted by her husband, whom she was separated from, and had only intended to ‘warn’ him when grabbing his testicles, she said.
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So the chain of causality was:
Man breaks into estranged wife’s home;
attacks her;
gets his nether region squeezed;
vomits; and,
chokes to death.
The Lesson
Seemingly comical martial arts techniques can actually work, to devastating effect.
If you want to learn more about Monkey Steals The Peach, check out this instructional from Mantis Kung Fu expert and BJJ black belt Randy Brown, who has turned the practice into a science.
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