Morality on the Mat

ultimoplata -I for one being married chose not to roll with a particular hot girl in no-gi.My only reason is that I think my wife might have a problem with it.I wouldn't know because I never have brought it up,at home or at training.I haven't made a public statement about it,I just seem to always find a way to work around it.

Keeping secrets from your wife isn't very pastorly.

... but it really has a lot to do with me being a Pastor

I smell BS. Was it in the first post, or this last one?

The insecurities are all yours. You are the one putting some weird stigma on the hot girl in class. Not them. They don't even know about it yet... because you are hiding it.

If you choose not to roll with her, don't blame it on what your wife or anyone in your congregation might think. Let them know and proceed from there. No one is likely to have an issue but you. Or they might have an issue, but only because you would probably present it as one.

On the topic, I had no issue rolling with the hottie in class; had no problem telling my wife about it; called my mom and bragged a little; texted my older brother and let him know; had no problem mentioning it to a few coworkers...

You're right on one count: I have no clue what it's like to surround myself with ignorant, closed-minded people that judge others without the benefit of the whole story. You knew what you were getting into when you became a pastor, though.

I am glad that you comment,and I am glad that you have an opinion.I just don't understand the ridiculous statement about sexual repression.I never brought that up and I didn't want this to be all about me.I wanted to spark a discussion not become the center.Maybe I shouldn't have mentioned that she was hot.If that twisted the thread then that's on me,that wasn't my intent.She just happens to be the only female in the pro classes.In my school there is a big difference in drills and rolling,and no the issue was not that it might upset my wife.The issue was that this was my personal decision based on my thought process.There are lots of things I do that might upset my wife.I made this thread because this decision involves MMA.I owned up to the fact that I have made a selfish decision based on my idea of personal responsibility to my wife and congregation.I just wanted to know if any of you have made similar decisions.

dude please space that out, my mind feels like it will explode reading one block of text.

i'll put my perspective in here.
if training BJJ with a woman is something you feel you should not do because it could be construed as sexual, then you should definitely quit rolling with dudes.


I think it's only a problem, when you let it become one.

I love this place,you guys def keep it interesting.Razor sharp wit and relationship help.Oprah has nothing on the UG.Thanks Sanders for all caps.

Please someone have a story about themselves to save me from this shame and ridicule. rofl

One time I went on an MMA forum with a big story about how I don't roll with the hot girl in class because I'm an important local pastor/christ figure who has to remain pure at all times and people laughed at me

I remember that, Mike. That was hilarious.

If you have a problem with it don't do it. Only you can know what's right for you. If the girl in class respects you as a training partner she won't have a problem with it and she probably appreciates, even if she doesn't realize it, that you're trying to set this boundary. This is because most of the other guys will say rolling isn't sexual, but if they got the chance 90% of them would hit it.In my case, there are some techniques I don't do with women because I don't want to have my hands all in their chests. Or my face, but when you're side mounted by a chubby chick trying to perform a boob choke you're kinda stuck with it.

Dude...your totally shooting down everyone's comments in an attempt to justify your weird feelings about rolling with attractive females.

We are all saying you are being weird and that these feelings are not the norm. And you are unwilling to hear any of this. So I'm confused as to why you even posted here looking for comments in the first place?

P.S. The girl in my class is not one of my "students" she is merely a training partner, but anyone who trains knows that good training partners are just as important to your learning experience as a good instructor.

oh and I'm sorry you feel the need to comment on my apparently inferior screen name...obviously I was definitely outdone by the ever so creative and divine one known as "Ultimoplata".


Pastor or not, I dont think its a problem at all.

Its bjj- you are expected to train with your classmates.

What would happen if you were an instructor? Would you also be selective about who you train with?