Need last minute white elephant gift idea

At office now. Leave for office in one hour. I need something for the white elephant and I need it now.

Last year I pulled this off and it was epic. I had my print shop print each of the photos below and threw them in some crappy frames from walmart. I need some legit fire this year guys and I have an hour to go. 

What's this white elephant you speak of? Phone Post 3.0

Festivus pole?

IDOHARM - What's this white elephant you speak of? Phone Post 3.0


Do they not do white elephant gift exchanges in America's hat?

Print out a custom made "Ticket to Pound Town" and hope that the cute girl from HR gets it, and then pray Lou from payroll doesn't steal it.





http://i.imgur.com/8XUePWC.jpg

price range?

Phuckles -
IDOHARM - What's this white elephant you speak of? Phone Post 3.0


Do they not do white elephant gift exchanges in America's hat?

Considering that I've never heard of it, I don't think so. Mind you, I've never worked in an office environment so I have no idea. Phone Post 3.0

hooke - price range?


Cheap as possible. I actually already left the office to get one of those creepy horse masks but it was $40 god damn dollars. So, fuck that. Maybe $20ish? 



I swore a solemn oath when I did my first white elephant gift exchange two years ago that I would not be the sellout who brings a bottle of alcohol. I may have to break my solemn oath this year after over 700 days of tradition.

IDOHARM - 
Phuckles -
IDOHARM - What's this white elephant you speak of? Phone Post 3.0


Do they not do white elephant gift exchanges in America's hat?

Considering that I've never heard of it, I don't think so. Mind you, I've never worked in an office environment so I have no idea. Phone Post 3.0


Allow Wikipedia to teach you everything you will ever need to know about Merica:



In its most basic form, the game is as follows:[5] each participant supplies one wrapped gift. The gifts are placed in a central location, and participants determine in what order they will take turns selecting them. The first person opens a wrapped gift and the turn ends. On subsequent turns, each person can open a new present or gets the choice to "steal" another person's unwrapped gift. When a person's gift is stolen, that person chooses another wrapped gift to open. The game is over when the last person has taken their turn (but see variations below).



Gifts are typically inexpensive, humorous items or used items from home. The term white elephant refers to a gift whose maintenance costs exceed its usefulness. While the first use of this term remains a matter of contention among historians,[6] one theory suggests that Ezra Cornell brought the term into the popular lexicon through his frequent social gatherings as early as 1828.

I got a 50 cal bottle opener and a lettuce Cooper shaped as a hand for mine.

I suck Phone Post 3.0

Chopper Phone Post 3.0

There was a thread someone posted where you could buy actual 100% pussy juice for $40 a bottle. Buy that. If you don't use it as a gift, pour it under someone's car seat and report back. Phone Post 3.0

Haha! 

 

Has anyone ever received an awesome gift that could potentially be last minute?

You should set up an account and buy it a blue name then hand somebody a piece of paper with the login info, it's brilliant. Phone Post 3.0

IDOHARM - You should set up an account and buy it a blue name then hand somebody a piece of paper with the login info, it's brilliant. Phone Post 3.0
L O Fucking L

(How could that possibly go wrong?) Phone Post 3.0

Also. If you run out of time just buy something for yourself and steal it on your turn. Phone Post

A dildo.

I suggest a gift card for pole dancing classes or weight watchers. Phone Post 3.0

10 dollar lotto scratcher Phone Post 3.0