Neighbor Is Impressed With My Wife Control

Last night I was having a glass of wine outside and our neighbor is out as well, so he comes over to say hi. We're talking for about 10 minutes and then my wife comes out. I hold my glass up to her and she says she doesn't care for any. I said no, it's empty. So without a word she goes in, get's the bottle comes out and refills my glass. The neighbor looks at me, raises an eyebrow and smiles, clearly impressed that I have trained her so well.

If anyone needs tips on how to train your wife, I'll be happy to help you.

2 Likes

Of all the things that never happened, this never happened the most.

2 Likes

You just have to hit them every once in a while, it's no secret. 

Captain CargoShorts: Pitbull Apologist -

You just have to hit them every once in a while, it's no secret. 

This man knows.  

Is she Asian?

Fuck his wife 

densefog - 

She's banging the neighbor.



Gah!  You just beat me.  



Obviously this. 


OPs wife

She queefed the neighbors cream pie into your wine 

Zned - 


Of all the things that never happened, this never happened the most.


Oh it happened and I have the hangover to prove it.

Fuck it, I'll take some advice....

Captain CargoShorts: Pitbull Apologist -

You just have to hit them every once in a while, it's no secret. 

Just ask Sean Connery or look up his interview with Barbara Walters.

Tim Duncan - 

Is she Asian?


No, she's a little blue eyed blonde haired woman.

She was brought up right, and I let her know my expectations early on.

1 Like

CaliKush - 

She queefed the neighbors cream pie into your wine 


Your language is offensive. You need to watch less porn and start to interact with actual women.

Haha, been doing that shit for years. I always hear people talk about marrying women that won't do shit for them and always thought it was a joke as if they were pretending they lived the Al Bundy stereotyped life. I figured why marry someone you hate?

Didn't realize I had it so good until one night about 10 years ago on poker night we had more people than usual over. I needed another beer but was a little too drunk and didnt want to stumble into anyone, plus didn't want to hold up the game. I said fuck it and texted my wife who was upstairs with her friends. She brought me down a beer and a bowl of pretzels. When she left the room my friends were all joking that I had to do that again when their gfs/wives were in the room.

I usually spit out a movie quote or something when I need something though. My go-to is "Hey bartender, Jo-Bou needs a refill!" for a drink and "Feed me, Seymour" when it's time to figure out whats for diner lol.

Lurker99 - Haha, been doing that shit for years. I always hear people talk about marrying women that won't do shit for them and always thought it was a joke as if they were pretending they lived the Al Bundy stereotyped life. I figured why marry someone you hate?

Didn't realize I had it so good until one night about 10 years ago on poker night we had more people than usual over. I needed another beer but was a little too drunk and didnt want to stumble into anyone, plus didn't want to hold up the game. I said fuck it and texted my wife who was upstairs with her friends. She brought me down a beer and a bowl of pretzels. When she left the room my friends were all joking that I had to do that again when their gfs/wives were in the room.

I usually spit out a movie quote or something when I need something though. My go-to is "Hey bartender, Jo-Bou needs a refill!" for a drink and "Feed me, Seymour" when it's time to figure out whats for diner lol.

Exactly, who needs some belligerent harpy?

It's amazing what insecure guys settle for.

I'll tell my wife that my glass is broke when I need a refill.

gemma - Hope that woman snaps and cuts your dick of one night.

LOL, why on earth would she do something like that?

Are you an ex-con? Who thinks that way?

Donkey Hotee - 
Munk -
Lurker99 - Haha, been doing that shit for years. I always hear people talk about marrying women that won't do shit for them and always thought it was a joke as if they were pretending they lived the Al Bundy stereotyped life. I figured why marry someone you hate?

Didn't realize I had it so good until one night about 10 years ago on poker night we had more people than usual over. I needed another beer but was a little too drunk and didnt want to stumble into anyone, plus didn't want to hold up the game. I said fuck it and texted my wife who was upstairs with her friends. She brought me down a beer and a bowl of pretzels. When she left the room my friends were all joking that I had to do that again when their gfs/wives were in the room.

I usually spit out a movie quote or something when I need something though. My go-to is "Hey bartender, Jo-Bou needs a refill!" for a drink and "Feed me, Seymour" when it's time to figure out whats for diner lol.

Exactly, who needs some belligerent harpy?

It's amazing what insecure guys settle for.

I'll tell my wife that my glass is broke when I need a refill.

“Exactly, who needs some belligerent harpy?”

 

well, your wife for one...


You sound insecure. I asked for a refill and she was happy to do it.

Why does that bother you?

Are you one of those silly feminist with a pink hat and a bitter heart?

Munk - Last night I was having a glass of wine outside and our neighbor is out as well, so he comes over to say hi. We're talking for about 10 minutes and then my wife comes out. I hold my glass up to her and she says she doesn't care for any. I said no, it's empty. So without a word she goes in, get's the bottle comes out and refills my glass. The neighbor looks at me, raises an eyebrow and smiles, clearly impressed that I have trained her so well.

If anyone needs tips on how to train your wife, I'll be happy to help you.

No way you actually have a wife

cfochs -
Captain CargoShorts: Pitbull Apologist -

You just have to hit them every once in a while, it's no secret. 

Just ask Sean Connery or look up his interview with Barbara Walters.

YEP ..