Well let me start by saying I just started BJJ about 2 months ago and have a few questions.
I rolled with my instructor who is a 7 year purple and he always goes for the lapel grip first,ALWAYS. I find myself in his guard as he is trying to get a grip on my lapel. I myself look for the same thing naturally because I do not know what to do, but before I know it I'm being setup for some kind of move. My question is should I get and maintain control of his hands? where should my hands be? I can not even think to pass his guard,I'm trying to defend my lapel. Should I posture up or close the space by laying into him? He always starts seated and scoots into me,its frustrating. The other guys in class all start on our knees. He always waits for me to move first generally.
Don't grab his lapel when you're in his guard.
If you don't like his lapel grip, break it
Google grip breaking
How big are you and how big is he
Im 5'10 195 and he is quite a bit taller and lankier but probably weighs in around 190. I will google grip breaking lol
HUMBLED1 - Well let me start by saying I just started BJJ about 2 months ago and have a few questions.In no way do I mean this as sarcastic or disrespectful, but have you tried asking your instructor what to do? Anytime my instructor has caught me in something he is usually the first one to tell me how I got myself there, what to do and what not to do, and the defense for said technique.
I rolled with my instructor who is a 7 year purple and he always goes for the lapel grip first,ALWAYS. I find myself in his guard as he is trying to get a grip on my lapel. I myself look for the same thing naturally because I do not know what to do, but before I know it I'm being setup for some kind of move. My question is should I get and maintain control of his hands? where should my hands be? I can not even think to pass his guard,I'm trying to defend my lapel. Should I posture up or close the space by laying into him? He always starts seated and scoots into me,its frustrating. The other guys in class all start on our knees. He always waits for me to move first generally.

I actually was going to ask him tonight at class what I can do to improve etc..... WE all were in a hurry to get home after last class.
This is my game, it comes from traditional roots.
2 things you can do 1) strip that first grip 2) when the hand goes in, put your own hand on his other bicep and watch it like a hawk. If he raises that hand above his shoulder, dont follow it (that is his way to bait the armbar) - put your hand on his chest until he re-engages that arm, then put it back on the bicep until you can get proper posture and negate the choke threat.
Well I did find a little success tonight with 1. stripping the grip 2. placing hand on bicep and controlling his other arm 3. controlling his hands a little more.He did try to raise his arm with bicep,I immediately let go. I did get caught in a cross collar choke, 2 triangles though lol. He probably was going EASY on me though. Overall, I felt a little better tonight. I asked him to point out what I did wrong when rolling and he did a good job of that. I literally had both arms in when he was trying to triangle then pulled one arm out and practically finished it for him.
I asked him what I should do in that guard situation and he said my main concern should be trying to pass guard and maintaining a good posture.
Anyways thanks for the replies.
You really can't win from inside the guard and as a raw beginner you should be looking at getting out. This will be a lot of your foundation training. Good posture in all positions and you're working on guard posture. You're mission is to thrust your hips/round your lower back so he can't pull you down. Keep your elbows in so he can't separate them from your sides and work on whatever position he's teaching whether it be passing under or getting to combat base. This is your mission for the next month of classes. The other stuff will come but show him you're trying to develop good basics that will carry over the next 20 years.
good luck
Just remember, you're a two-month white belt. He's a purple belt.
Unless you possess wildly more size/athleticism or have a lot of other grappling experience, or unless he is a really crappy purple belt, you will probably NEVER beat him. Or at the very least, it should take a YEAR or more until you're even capable of threatening him, and then it will only be because in the interest of challenging himself he ALLOWED you to advance to a position that he had trouble getting out of.
In other words, if he's a "legit" purple and you aren't a former standout wrestler or some sort of athletic phenom, you should accept that for so long as you both continue to train, you're never going to pass (or even approach) his skill level. At least not for many years. By the time you're a "7-year purple" he's going to be a "14-year black."
So please don't focus on figuring out how to "beat" him. You won't be able to, and that "failure" can defeat you mentally after awhile. Focus on "improving," not "winning."
I think you're doing that btw, I just wanted to mention it for the sake of perspective.
Thanks for the replies Renzo's elbow and MTH.
Somehow I did manage to gain side control last night and pull off an americana/V-lock, but I firmly believe he let me do so. It's one of the 2 subs that we have learned thus far.It was nice because he chose me to roll with fresh not after a couple of rounds with the other white belts. I had a little more in the tank last night.
I will be happy just to be where he is at skill level wise,never quit and keep learning.
Definitely trying to improve and progress and enjoy the journey.
I use low posture passing against that, either head down tripod to knee in the middle or some kind of sao paolo pass.
Rob can you explain further or post a video of what you are talking about.??
ANd thanks Issac.
If he is playing open guard a cross collar grip is a good way to stop you from passing and allowing him to sit up.
Don't allow the grip if possible try to control his pants/ legs if your goal is to pass.