Jack Carter -
Phaedo - I'll be back shortly to share my sad story...Cam on!
Shit... LONG story short...
I dated a great girl for 10 years. She was pretty and honest, which I now realize is the most important traits in a woman. I was faithful, but I flirted with other girls a lot. And I always wondered what it would be like to be single. I didn't want to sleep with tons of women, but I did have some romantic ideal of myself as independent and living on my own. I'm a serial monogamist, and I didn't know what it was like to be alone.
Well, I was spending a year studying in Europe without my girlfriend, and I realized that if I hadn't committed to her yet, it wasn't going to happen... without some change on my part. And there was another girl that I was interested in (although that wasn't why I broke up... but it helped). So, I broke up with my girlfriend. I ended my ten year relationship, via Skype. It took me about a week to realize that I hate being single. It really just isn't in my nature. A couple months later, I started dating the other girl I was interested in.
So, a month or so after that, I come back to the USA. My Ex and I were living together. She moved, so I found all my stuff packed up in boxes and my friends house. Then I realized that I was an idiot. She and I had something good. And I didn't appreciate it. But, she made it pretty clear that she wanted nothing to do with me. Breaking up with her after 10 years... she's not forgiving that. She moved on. I dated the girl from Europe for awhile - but I missed my ex. And I just broke up with the girl from Europe.
So, now I'm totally alone. Most of the people I spent time with were actually my ex's friends... so, now I'm alone, with very few friends, in my 30s... and I miss her... 10 years gone.
I don't think I could have done otherwise, given who I was. But it's tragic. The "me" post-breakup and the "her" pre-breakup could have had a great relationship - but they'll never meet.
So now I just drink and think about what I lost.