Open letter to Michael The Count Bisping

Michael, you British son of a gun...

We've been friendly for years now Michael, and it's always a pleasure to see you continue to stick with it, no matter the numerous, heart wrenching, defeats, when it was time to step it up. But to your credit, and a bit of pride for England and the Queen, you did it! I'm not going to lie Michael, I had you counted out and done against Anderson. You got away with one, but all credit to you, you managed to get the W, despite the in cage KO. Amazing! I'll be in Orange county next week, and I hope to throw a couple cold ones back with you, in celebration of your improbable and to be honest, shocking win, this past Saturday night.

Now it's on to establishing a credible run and working on legacy and bank account.

Don't you dare face Rockhold again, he's not going to be playing around this time.

Do not be baited by Weidman, he'll be ready and looking to get his belt back. Avoid him like the plague.

Jacare and Romero are both very difficult, tough outs, for you, with your skill set and physical tools. Whatever you have to do in order to avoid the both of them, do it.

Machida, if that guy becomes available, after all, it was an honest mistake, do not get in the cage with him, under any circumstances.

So who's left? Who does the reigning middle weight champion of the world face off against, which is a winnable fight, and which will not take a hit on the legacy? You've got to be smart about this Michael. You have to find a way to fight the non top threats to your belt, while still making it out to be legit , bouts, never mind prestige or merit to the championship. There is none anyways, this whole cage fight spectacle (as you very well know) is a crock. Forget about "deserve" or "earned", this is about riding this thing out as long as you can., fooling the dumb mma fan base which still believes it's all legit and on the up and up, and collecting as many 7 figure checks as you can possibly swindle.

Michael, Dan Henderson did you a favor. He's almost 50 years old now, and he has 3,000,000 miles on that old, slow, body of his. He's a frail, old man, Michael. Accept Dan's challenge immediately and demand (in public, we all know no one demands shit to Zuffa, it will just be for effect) the bout take place in England. Yes, on English soil, Michael!

Just imagine it. Wembly Stadium, Dan, draped in old glory. The USA national anthem playing, On the jumbo tron, the American Bald Eagle, Military Jets, Mt Rushmore, a little girl running through corn fields in the mid west, and the USS California, off in the south pacific. I got chills just writing that, Michael. Then the camera turns to Mother England. The Queen!!! It's USA vs England and it's a chance at redemption. Michael, with bag pipes playing, you in a kilt, and all of England's hopes riding on your back, to vanquish the evil USA empire, and to restore prestige to the tainted belt, which you carry across your shoulder, yes you can Michael!!! You can do this.

Available on PPV for $79.95 Michael the fan base is full of dorks and nerds, insecure wanna be's who will pay to feel lie they are a part of this. Like your win somehow reflects on them and lifts them from their failures. We'll talk more next weekend, but start getting ready, this is the next play.

We can evaluate after, who poses less of a threat, deflated Vitor, or no dick pill Andy. Belfort is another shot at redemption, and the bout can be sold as such. The world believes you lost to Anderson, so that could be sold as a redemption fight. Let the actual contenders knock each other off, and wait it out, while you go on the redemption tour. And just when the 3rd bout is concluded and they all feel one of them is next, you call out Chael!!!!!

Michael, I'll call you later, I can't get over how gullible and to be frank, down right ignorant the fan base is and can be. You're going to be rich.

frat

-the count

You need a hobby. Phone Post 3.0

Every time you wrote "Michael," I read it in Sandra Bullock's voice from The Blind Side. Phone Post 3.0

Michael, I believe Vitor should be next.

Since USADA, the Phenom has looked deflated. A shell of himself. A dad bod, if you will. He has got to be on empty. Following a 25 minute decision win over Dan, via Jab and Jag, strategy, you call out Belfort, but it's important you phrase it in fashion to indicate this is personal, and that's the reason for the bout. Like McGregor does with the 145 pound belt, ignoring title defenses, because he's obsessed with Diaz at 170 lbs. Your actions are no where near as egregious, as you'll be defending your belt, just in an order of opponents, you see fit to defeat, due to personal and "extraordinary circumstances". Zuffa is giving that excuse to Brock right now for he doping tests. This is a no brainer.

Michael, you take a page out of Chael's book, and you disrespect the Brazilian people. You tell Belfort you're going to beat him back to the favela he escaped from, and you make the fight at Macarena Stadium! Over 100,000 screaming, blood thirsty Brazilians, and you get on your bicycle, and jab and jog for 25 minutes, you cannot lose.

England vs Brazil, and you even incorporate Germany's 7-0 dismantling of Brazil at the world cup. Highlights of the 7 goals and then the hoisting of the cup. Then it cuts away to you running across the cage in celebration, this will be huge. Brazil is broke, so you can't sell anything to them, but the stupid Americans and Canadians are likely to buy the shit out of that PPV. Charge $69.95 and they'll think they got a break! You just have to win that bout, and it sets up a mega fight, which can be in NYC, Las Vegas, England, Rio, Teas Stadium, it doesn't matter. Throw Fedor on the under card, perhaps a girl fight or two, maybe a midget and a TUFer, and you've got a block buster brewing.

The North American wankers will eat it up like the shit sandwich Zuffa has been selling them for years now, only this time they get a quality main event, with the Count, the best middle weight in the world, showing up and delivering.

Hendo in London

Belfort in Rio

Anderson in Dallas

Lets do this Michael.



Mexican Independence day weekend, Dallas TX, AT and T Stadium

Michael,

you're from foreign soil, and you really haven't embraced the Mexican culture a whole lot, as far as I can tell. You get a pass, but the ignorant American MMA fans for the most part, have no clue, Mexican Independence day, is on Sept 16, and not on Cinco de Mayo (May 5). Yes it's true, I've sat with many from the fan base, and to hear them utter the misinformation, and quite frankly Michael, the ignorance they spew, one can only shake their head, at the prospects of our countries future, given the depths we have plummeted to, during the decay of our education system. You wouldn't expect me to know the Queen's birthday, right? Of course not. But an entire culture celebrating a war victory over the French is now confused with the day of Independence? And get this! I have run into people at UFC events (The 4th of July shows) who believe 4th of July is a world wide holiday, representing independence across the world. Michael I bullshit you not, these hillbillies, red necks, misogynists, homophobes, drunken, buffoons, who comprise your fan base, are about as low level as I have ever seen.

But that notwithstanding Michael, you get your redemption against Anderson Silva, for knocking you silly, and convincing most of the world, he beat you via KO. You impose a strict, no dick pill restriction, the bout is on neutral soil in Dallas, you bring your track shoes, and you jab and jog for 25 minutes, and you bring home the win. The legacy will be set. You will have taken out 3 consecutive all time MMA legends, Hendo, Vitor, Anderson, and all in world championship title defenses. You immediately must be considered for GOAT (or at least of the past 20 years). The MMA Mt Rushmore will legitimately welcome the mug of Michael Bisping, but you must win these 3 bouts in succession. I know you can do it, Michael. You can do this!

Just as the press conference is wrapping up, and you're almost done fielding question as to who will be next, a dark shadowy figure emerges from the back of the room. He's wearing a trench coat, and reporter's hat. You turn the questioning around and you say:

"I don't know guys, who do you think should be next?"

Just then Stone Cold music begins to blare through the media room, and it's Chael Sonnen! He says:

"The bad guy's next"

and the video feed dies.

These dorks and newbs, from the WWE, who now comprise 70% of the fan base, will go absolutely bananas, Michael.

NYC, Chael vs Bisping, the battle for respect.

How dare he crash your post fight media interview? Play it just as GSP did, when he demanded Diaz, because he had disrespected him so badly, he must fight him net. Michael, Zuffa went as far as to cast Condit aside, and blamed it on GSP demanding it. You do the same. They will love it, the fan base will eat it up.

Cha Ching...

This thread is like trying to finish when you are drunk and doing a girl you aren't into.  No offense OP, just s lot of work with no enjoyable payoff. 

Hindu Nuffin - Every time you wrote "Michael," I read it in Sandra Bullock's voice from The Blind Side. Phone Post 3.0
Haha, I read it as Kitt from Knight Rider Phone Post 3.0

Peculiar - 


Hey, man, I, highly, doubt, Michael, Bisping, will, have, anything, to, drink, with, you. 



Not, just, next, week, but, never, ever, ever, ever.



Man, you, are, a, strange, one. One, of, the, strangest.



But, I, hope, you achieve, enjoyment, out, of, this forum, and, it helps, you, feel, good.


Thank you Peculiar,

That's the only reason I come here. I come here for enjoyment. One of my hobby's is writing. I thoroughly enjoy it, and I have a reading list of nearly triple digits. When I craft one of my MANY stories, letters, opinions, etc., I blast it out, and I get feedback for days. Mostly laughing and thanking me for my way of expressing myself, and some constructive critique as well.

I have just been asked to write a blog for a yorkshire terrier site, I visit regularly. It's now the 5th blog I'm writing across different topics.

Michael was part of Wolfslair, which was formed off from Team Punishment and a couple of my very good friends went there, including Michael Kongo, and Rampage's wrestling coach. Of course Page and Bisping had a fall out, but it doesn't affect my friendship with either. Kongo is the nicest guy I have ever met, anywhere. We attended an Angel's game not long ago. Bisping I only get to hang out with a couple times per year or so. We're just not in the same type of scene. You might be right, I haven't even told him I'll be in his neck of the woods, and he might not even be around. But if I do end up seeing him, I'll let him know he has many new fans at mma.tv, who think highly of him. He might even read this, and bust my balls over it. I hope so, those tend to generate the funniest moments.

Thank you for you input.

rIKmAN - 
Hindu Nuffin - Every time you wrote "Michael," I read it in Sandra Bullock's voice from The Blind Side. Phone Post 3.0
Haha, I read it as Kitt from Knight Rider Phone Post 3.0

Bwahahahaahhahahaa! Hand't considered that.

I have the computer read it to me, and "Michael" comes across as very profound.

Those of you who have iphones, have siri read it to you, it makes it very funny, hearing it from her.

Rudi - You need a hobby. Phone Post 3.0
He has one, it's hating mma Phone Post 3.0

SinCity..That was awesome, funny, and a brilliant promotional plan all rolled into one.


You understand the game.

LOL. This rules.

rIKmAN -
Hindu Nuffin - Every time you wrote "Michael," I read it in Sandra Bullock's voice from The Blind Side. Phone Post 3.0
Haha, I read it as Kitt from Knight Rider Phone Post 3.0
I was doing Donald pleasance's voice as the psychiatrist in Halloween Phone Post 3.0

SinCityHustler - Michael, you British son of a gun...

We've been friendly for years now Michael, and it's always a pleasure to see you continue to stick with it, no matter the numerous, heart wrenching, defeats, when it was time to step it up. But to your credit, and a bit of pride for England and the Queen, you did it! I'm not going to lie Michael, I had you counted out and done against Anderson. You got away with one, but all credit to you, you managed to get the W, despite the in cage KO. Amazing! I'll be in Orange county next week, and I hope to throw a couple cold ones back with you, in celebration of your improbable and to be honest, shocking win, this past Saturday night.

Now it's on to establishing a credible run and working on legacy and bank account.

Don't you dare face Rockhold again, he's not going to be playing around this time.

Do not be baited by Weidman, he'll be ready and looking to get his belt back. Avoid him like the plague.

Jacare and Romero are both very difficult, tough outs, for you, with your skill set and physical tools. Whatever you have to do in order to avoid the both of them, do it.

Machida, if that guy becomes available, after all, it was an honest mistake, do not get in the cage with him, under any circumstances.

So who's left? Who does the reigning middle weight champion of the world face off against, which is a winnable fight, and which will not take a hit on the legacy? You've got to be smart about this Michael. You have to find a way to fight the non top threats to your belt, while still making it out to be legit , bouts, never mind prestige or merit to the championship. There is none anyways, this whole cage fight spectacle (as you very well know) is a crock. Forget about "deserve" or "earned", this is about riding this thing out as long as you can., fooling the dumb mma fan base which still believes it's all legit and on the up and up, and collecting as many 7 figure checks as you can possibly swindle.

Michael, Dan Henderson did you a favor. He's almost 50 years old now, and he has 3,000,000 miles on that old, slow, body of his. He's a frail, old man, Michael. Accept Dan's challenge immediately and demand (in public, we all know no one demands shit to Zuffa, it will just be for effect) the bout take place in England. Yes, on English soil, Michael!

Just imagine it. Wembly Stadium, Dan, draped in old glory. The USA national anthem playing, On the jumbo tron, the American Bald Eagle, Military Jets, Mt Rushmore, a little girl running through corn fields in the mid west, and the USS California, off in the south pacific. I got chills just writing that, Michael. Then the camera turns to Mother England. The Queen!!! It's USA vs England and it's a chance at redemption. Michael, with bag pipes playing, you in a kilt, and all of England's hopes riding on your back, to vanquish the evil USA empire, and to restore prestige to the tainted belt, which you carry across your shoulder, yes you can Michael!!! You can do this.

Available on PPV for $79.95 Michael the fan base is full of dorks and nerds, insecure wanna be's who will pay to feel lie they are a part of this. Like your win somehow reflects on them and lifts them from their failures. We'll talk more next weekend, but start getting ready, this is the next play.

We can evaluate after, who poses less of a threat, deflated Vitor, or no dick pill Andy. Belfort is another shot at redemption, and the bout can be sold as such. The world believes you lost to Anderson, so that could be sold as a redemption fight. Let the actual contenders knock each other off, and wait it out, while you go on the redemption tour. And just when the 3rd bout is concluded and they all feel one of them is next, you call out Chael!!!!!

Michael, I'll call you later, I can't get over how gullible and to be frank, down right ignorant the fan base is and can be. You're going to be rich.
Pretty douchy post imo Phone Post 3.0

For someone who hates MMA you sure have a lot to say about it. Phone Post 3.0

bluenoser - SinCity..That was awesome, funny, and a brilliant promotional plan all rolled into one.



Glad you liked it. Most will have the satirical aspect, sail over their heads. Those of you who get it, however, I think you'll enjoy it as much as I did, writing it. Thanks for the comments.

bluenoser - SinCity..That was awesome, funny, and a brilliant promotional plan all rolled into one.


More like Brown Noser!



Good read start to finish, 4.73/5 stars! Would read again!


Sin, you hooked me in the first 2 sentences. I hope your boy sees this and breaks your balls for it. DO NOT REFER TO HIM AS ANYTHING BUT CHAMPION. Don't get friendly and call him Champ, say the whole word.

Will VU again. Phone Post 3.0

Giga? Phone Post 3.0