Sh*t your kids have said to strangers

My  3 year old one time said to black lady u must been out in sun to long

My kid was with my mom at the grocery store and saw a Sikh man with a turban.  

My kid says 'look gramma!  A Genie!'  

The guy kinda snickered and kept walking.  Mom was mortified. 

My kid said to a Hindu lady that had a Bindi “you have ketchup on your forehead.

 

EFM -

When i was a kid, my dad would take my sister and I to his office on saturday mornings.  He was general counsel for a small company and probably clocked in 80 hrs a week.  My sister and I would play office in his secretary's space and this empty office next to his.  One day when I was about 7 or 8, we ran out of post-it notes so I went rummaging through other desks looking for some.  I happened into the CEOs secretary's desk and found some.  Before I left her desk, and for reasons to this day I can not remember or even fathom, i wrote on the top post it note "for a good fuck, call ted crowder" and stuck it in her keyboard.  Ted crowder was my best friend and lived across the street from me.  I included his phone number.

moday evening rolls around and i got a long talk from my dad.  He was not happy.  I don't remember most of the conversation, but i do remember him asking me, "do you even know what a good fuck is?".

I was never allowed back to his office as a kid.  He died while still working there when I was 29.  I was the executor of his estate.  I had to go into the office and meet with his boss to finalize some things with his pension and his corporate life insurance policy.  When we were finished, I spent about 4 hours just talking to his boss about my dad.  I had no idea they were such good friends, probably best friends.  I had no idea my dad had this whole other life i knew nothing about.  80 hrs a week he spent with these people.  I knew nohing about them, but they knew everything about me.  It was eye opening and touching.  

As we were wrapping up, his boss said, "hey, how's Ted Crowder?".  I immediately knew what he was talking about.  As it turns out, Ted Crowder became a legend in my dad's office.  He would come up in meetings and conversations when ever someone needed a fall guy or didnt know the answer to something.  "I dont know, let me ask Ted Crowder".  "Sounds like Ted Crowder fucked this deal up".  Apparently my dad never lived it down.  He never mentioned that to me.  I have no idea if my mom ever knew anything about it either as she died just before he did.

That story is awesome. Thank you for sharing it 

In early

Our sitter (Stephanie) came in with one of her friends last month. My 4 year old yells upstairs "Daddy, that's not Stephanie, it's a fat girl with glasses." The friend was indeed a fat girl with glasses. Stephanie has walked into the kitchen before my son got downstairs.

My daughter once pointed at an old middle eastern woman wearing a headscarf and yelled "a hedgehog!" 

So... when i have kids it seemd like i should be aware when having them around small/fat people, midgets, and black people...

thank god my son never did this

He always had this social awareness and is oddly considerate of others' feelings for his age

How have I not seen this thread? The first page I was already crying. Early and often.

One time when my brother was little he was sitting in the shopping trolley while mum did the shopping. 

A really fat woman waddled past and my brother is sitting there staring at her. 

Mum knew he was going to say something bad but couldn't divert his attention in time. 

Sure enough, bro pipes up with "we don't like fat people do we mum? They stink!"

He was 4. Mum was mortified 

In Limbo -

thank god my son never did this

He always had this social awareness and is oddly considerate of others' feelings for his age

Make him a UG/OG account and that'll soon change 

Fucking Ted Crowder. What a great story!

My son once asked a 65 year old mail lady if he could see her cunt. It was on a dare apparently lol. He was 8

anunaki -

My son once asked a 65 year old mail lady if he could see her cunt. It was on a dare apparently lol. He was 8

Thats the son of an Oger right there.

EFM -
anunaki -

My son once asked a 65 year old mail lady if he could see her cunt. It was on a dare apparently lol. He was 8

Thats the son of an Oger right there.

Screen name?

Had dinner at a buddies house a while back. His mom lives with them amd when dinner was ready he yelled out "dinner's ready! Come eat gramdma!"

 

His 10 year old daughter yells back "commas save lives!"

3 year old twins to my wife, on a daily basis: “all mommys songs are hot garbage!”

they’re right, as wife listens to alot of pop and rap.

IGotPipedByStipe -
EFM -
anunaki -

My son once asked a 65 year old mail lady if he could see her cunt. It was on a dare apparently lol. He was 8

Thats the son of an Oger right there.

Screen name?

Multiple Miggs