Sherdog Canadian Contest #2

Underground
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Welcome again to another edition of the "Sherdog Canada Contest!"

That's right! That crazy wildman Jeff at Sherdog loves Canada so much that he has decided to have another contest to keep us all happy here in the great white north!

But before we get to the contest rules I decided to hone my journalistic skills and interview Jeff from Sherdog and test his knowledge of Canada! Not being one to use the phone a lot and being far too lazy to use the internet and e-mail him I decided to use my psychic telepathy powers to conduct the interview.

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Dougie - Hi Jeff. I got the dvds and we're going to have a great contest again for us Canucks, but first I want to interview you for the Canadian underground.

Jeff - God? Is that you? I can hear you in my head!

D - No, it's Dougie. Sorry about that. Did I barge in at a bad time?

J - Jeebus! Don't do that! No, it's not a bad time. Just let me tell these porn starlets to go make me a sandwhich and we'll take a break.

D - Great! Hey, I want to thank you for having these contests.

J - Hey, no worries. Canada has done so much for us. I mean, Quebec strippers are the bomb here. I mean, who wants to watch 'Miss Potato 2002' from Idaho dance?

D - I can't argue with that logic.

J - Hey, can you get into anyone's head like this? What is Jennifer Lopez doing right now? Can you do three way calling? You don't come into my head
when I am not aware of it and watch do you? 'Cause, I mean, that girl was was at least 18 and...

D - No. I don't do any of that.

J - whew Ok. Ask away!

D - Alrighty! Who is the Queen that Canada considers itself affliated with?

J - Easy. Celine Dion. Before her I think it was Anne Murray.

D - Um no. It's Queen Elizebeth the second.

J - Is she hot?

D - I dunno, they're British. Who can figure them out? Who is the Prime Minister of Canada?

J - That's like the President right? I am pretty sure it was Wayne Gretzky before but I was talking to Marco Antico and he says it's Stephan Patry now.

D - Uh, ok. It's not.

J - Showdown Joe?

D - No.

J - Bigfoot?

D - No. Next question. What do you think about Canadians like Dennis Kang, Patrick Cote, and George St. Peezy coming to the USA to fight in MMA?

J - Well, I think it's a damn shame that they have to leave Canada to follow guys like Carlos Newton's example to fight MMA. I'm aware that there are some
changes going on and people are pushing to have MMA legalized in certain provinces so I hope soon Canada will have more venues for it's spectacular athletes. I love the way those guys fight and they're photographer's dreams.

D - No kidding!

J - Can you hold on a second? I have to yell at the women washing my ferrari and my lambourgini to do it nakid because their thongs might scratch my cars.

D - Ok.

(brief pause)

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J - Ok, I'm back. Hey, did they resolve that hockey dispute yet?

D - No, I'm sure hell will freeze over first.

J - You tell Canadians that they can always buy dvd's from Sherdog to bide the time until it's back on.

D - Thanx.

J - Hey, can we wrap this up? I have to go work out in a bit. I'm benching 2000 lbs now?

D - 2000 lbs?

J - Hey, this is gonna be on the internet. I can say whatever I want. I also look like George Clooney.

D - Right. Ok, How do you rate your cooking skills?

J - I don't. I'm filthy rich. I pay swimsuit models to cook for me. But if you get the chance will you send me some Poutine? I love that stuff.

D - Well, I think we've sorta gotten a bit off track. So let's finish this with a final question, What is the biggest structure that you can see from space in Canada?

J - Oh that's easy. JHR's skull.

D - Um...ok.

J - Well, I have to go. Those porn starlets have finished making me a BLT, Then we're gonna get in the jacuzzi and make a Sherdog sandwhich if you get my drift.

D - Dude, I'm using telepathy to talk with you, I can see exactly what you're getting at.

J - GET OUT! GET OUT OF MY HEAD! AUUUUGH!

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Ok! On to the contest! Sherdog has sent 3 dvds for the Canadian UG. The UFC Ultimate Knock Outs #3, Pride Beasts From The East 2, and Grappler's Quest Beasts From the East All you have to do is send an e-mail to me at dougee@Canada.com and you can win one of them. Canucks only!

On top of that each winner will get 2 copies of The Natural Magazine and 2 previous UFC event flyers!

My Wife will pick the winners Jan 8th!

The only people who cannot enter the contest are Portuguese and Farmer because they already won once. Also, if you are my ex-girlfriend who lives in Toronto then you're out.

So get e-mailing!

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Proving, once again, Dougie just has way too much time on his hands. My email has been sent.

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At first, I thought he meant the Portuguese and farmers were not allowed to enter in general.

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did he say porn starlets?

is Sky Lopez there with Jeff Sherdog?

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If nothing else, Danny knows his porn.

He can name the actress by her orgasm.....I wish I was kidding.

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I`m sick.

I need help.

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TTT

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Awesome, I am in.

TTT
Wade

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Can I enter the third contest?

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Nice interview......The only porn starlet I would take is Jenna. But I'm not up on all the new ones they all seem to look alike. But my porn collection are on VHS's to give you a idea of my collection. Jenna was hot back then.

That was funny looks like you said no Portuguese farmers and that is exactly what my ancestors are.

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I thought you were leaving......Don;t give up yet the guy has been flaking but hopefully he coems back. Like you always do somehow someway....BSF always returns

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Portuguese & Farmer.

Ahhh these funny internet nicknames!

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you have mail ;)

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How much brown-nosing do I have to do to guarantee a win this time? My depravity knows no limits...

email is sent!

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E-mail sent...:)

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ditto :)

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I'm in like Flynn!