Stories of feeling like a complete asshole. Please share yours

When COVID started. A few friends of mine started a little group, shooting the shot on Snapchat. We’ve kept it going. Anyway, a friend who’s a couple yrs older posts a pic of a restaurant/bar he’s at. I vaguely remember it. Bring up the town/city. Got my second shot and have tomorrow off. So I had a few cocktails. Then…my STUPID ass typed, who’s the blonde in the corner? He types “my daughter” He took his 21 yr old daughter out. And I’m yapping about her like she’s a piece of tail.
I feel like I was just kicked in the gut.
Anyone else, fall into a moment where they feel like a douche? Make me feel better?
And yea I know the rules. But it’s Snapchat. It was deleted.

So flame away.
I fucking … ughhhhh. Idk.


IMO you can’t be blamed for admiring an attractive 21 year old. He should be honored. Imagine if you were like “Look out for SHAMU behind you!” He’s probably thought it over and came to this same realization by now.

I’ve never had anything that bad, but I went to McDonalds a few months ago to buy breakfast for around 12 people. The bill came out to over $60 and when I got to the window, the cashier said that the car in front of me said they would pay for my order. She looked a little confused like she didn’t know if she should do it or not because it was so much money but she just did it anyway. I felt pretty guilty so I said I’d pay for the car behind me. They were buying a single McCafe. I am ashamed and can never go back to that McDonalds now.


In early. I love these threads.

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Back in college I was be bopping down the stroll going to haley center for a freshman prereq class. The entrance to the haley center was a bank of heavy glass and metal doors, probably like 8 sets of doors to accommodate class changes. During the summer time they ran the ac so hard in the building that the doors were hard to open because of the vacuum pressure. So as I’m going in one of the doors a guy tries to wedge himself through the door way before me. Fuck that guy, so I threw a little bit of a shoulder to push him back out the doorway until I got through. Even though it was only a slight shove guy falls over. I felt terrible, like a real asshole. Especially after I helped him up and handed him back his cane. What cane you say? The white one with a red tip. Guy was blind. He said he just thought the door was open, I never saw the cane. Bought the guy lunch at chi fil a and all was well.


I’m trying to mend the fence now. Idk if chic fil ah will win over him.
Such is life. Lol

Christmas Eve two years ago. We had my parents over for dinner. Everyone is at the table ready to eat and I go to grab the rolls out of the oven. I grab a kitchen towel instead of an actual oven mitt and proceed to burn my hand. I scream FUCK as I jump I am in pain. On instinct out of anger I kick and break the cabinet door next to the oven. Like broke the wood.

So everyone is ready to eat and I just broke our cabinet doors in front of everyone, screaming like it was a football game. Now my parents are just wondering if I am ok with my hand but my wife is mad AF giving me a death stare.

Needless to say I spent Christmas Eve using wood glue to repair my cabinet with a hand wrapped up. It was more of an accident as a reaction to burning myself but I did kick my cabinet screaming in front of the entire family. lol


One time talking with a small group of coworkers a lady who I was unfamiliar with was present and I asked her how far along she was. She sternly said “I’m not pregnant”. I was embarrassed and didn’t know how to save it and tried to say something and she quickly interrupted me and said, “just stop”.
I stopped.


Another time I was at an insurance agents office going over insurance options and I saw a picture of her family. I asked what her daughter’s names were and she said, “Those are my Son’s”. In my defense both her young sons had long hair.


Right. The OG has some pretty good story tellers!!

I was selling some dirt bike riding gear on Craigslist. Cheap. I was asking 45 for a chest protector. Get a text about a meet up. He canceled 30 minutes before. This happened 3 days in a row and my patience was gone. So I cuss this guy out. Tell him he’s fucking me around… I don’t have time for it and to lose my number!

So an hour later I received a 3 page letter from this kids mom scolding me, full scorched earth. Turns out he was 14 and had been mowing lawns for days trying to come up with the money. Yeah… I felt like shit. I apologized and met them the next day and gave the kid a break on the price. Really felt bad about that one. Had to meet his parents and everything. So yeah…


endless LOLs

when I was a teenager I was taking documents to a different office tower downtown. I got out of the elevator and decided to be a cunt and press all the buttons for every floor (80 floors) on my way out. about 5 people get in the elevator and mean mugging me as I walk away, problem was I was stuck in the parkade 4th level because I didnt have a swipe card to get out. so in order to get out of the building I had to get on the elevator with those 5 pissed off people and take it back up to the main level. that was a very quiet ride.


I was checking into a hotel and behind an angry group of middle aged ladies. I was in line for something like 20 minutes, which felt like an eternity. The clerk was a younger black guy hobbling around on crutches. So, he had to deal with these women, go grab things from his work area, use a computer, and answer a phone all while on these crutches.

I felt bad for him and tried to be nice when it was my turn, even though I was annoyed by the situation. As he was struggling to go grab me a receipt from the printer I said, “Man, they should get you a chair with wheels until you can get off those crutches.” He didn’t really acknowledge this, but he was busy.

I was feeling pretty good about myself until, as he crutches over to grab the key cards, I notice he’s missing a leg.


Calgary flames game about 10 years ago. Islanders are in town. fight breaks out and Islanders guy gets starched, Im a flames fan so Im giving him the gears from the stands and yelling stuff and high fiving my friends. then I get a tap on the shoulder and the woman sitting next to me goes “thats my son your cheering about”. I felt bad instantly. her son laid out KOd on the ice and Im there next to her losing my shit like its a UFC fight.


Oh my god dude I feel so bad on your behalf I wish that innocent hard working bmx loving kid had a gofundme we could support lol


Both your stories are great but this one cracked me up hard ha ha ha

I was a bit of a stoner back in highschool. We also had a science teacher who has deaf wife. One day we went to my buddies house for lunch to smoke a bowl or two before heading back and for some reason we start talking shit and making jokes about his sex life wtih his deaf wife ( in hindsight we were terrible kids). Well it just happens that the deaf wife is the aunt of my buddies girlfriend. She starts screaming at us all and storms out of the shed. I really felt like a piece of shit and the next few times going over there were more than akward


Will post mine when I have more time.

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I was at a neighborhood Christmas party, drinking & talking with a group of guys. One guy who I knew a little bit walks up into the conversation, and he has blue stuff all over his hands. I said “What’d you do, jack off a smurf?” He replies “No, actually I have Raynaud’s Syndrome”. Raynaud’s is a circulatory disorder than can make extremities turn bluish.

I felt like a major ass, but he was cool about it & we continued drinking.


I did volunteering (through high school program) at a nursing home and would go visit the elderly. It was actually pretty cool, but one day I visited an older lady who looked pregnant. As I walked out of the room, I said to my buddy that I didn’t understand how she could be pregnant. I then heard her yell as I was walking away that she had stomach cancer.

I felt horrible. She died a few weeks later. It was like and asshole x10 moment.