Teenage Daughter bailed out on me :(

Turning 17 in 10 days and we had a blowup at dinner. She ran away.

Haven't heard from her since. It's been a week.

Says I'm too strict and is back living with her whore of a mother who has no rules at her house.

I'm tired of fighting for her. I've played the outstanding dad for 17yrs. I think I'm done.

My door is always open to her but don't think I'm gonna go to court and fight for her back this time. Fuck all these emotional teenage girl mood swings.

Any advice from OG dads who have been through it is appreciated bit other than that I'm just venting.


Judge Phone Post 3.0

Wtf? It's been a week and you don't know where she is? Phone Post 3.0

sorry just read she's with her mom. My bad. My ADD kicked in halfway thru post... Phone Post 3.0

This post makes me extremely scared for my future. My daughter is currently 2. Hang in there bro. Everything will work out Phone Post 3.0

She's 17 so I guess the worst is over.

She will have her head up her ass until about 22. Then she will start to recognize a strange event know as reality....make sure she experiences this. Phone Post

I'd say don't lose heart but do let her find her own way for a bit. She's going to make mistakes but I time she will see who you are and what you've done. I hope this is true, anyway. I've three daughters. Phone Post 3.0

Hey, im not a father but i had a similar experience as a teenager.

Mums house was no rules, could come and go as i pleased, do as i pleased

dads house was strict rules, no going places without him knowing exactly where and when etc

i had a falling out with dad and basically we didnt see each other for a year

fast foward 8 years and me and my dad have a good relationship.

she will come to realise that the slack rules at her mums house were really no good in hindsight. so keep up contact and try your best, she may not appreciate it now but one day she will.

Oh man. Been through some rough patches with my own daughter (17 in a little over a month).

She has lived with me ever since her mom and I got divorced - I adopted her at a young age.

Not sure I can offer that much as far as advice goes, but don't ever let her see you emotionally break from something she has done/said. She will use that same tactic every chance she gets.

She is old enough to realize that her actions will probably get adult type consequences but dumb enough not to give a crap. You are in a tough spot.

Make sure you let her know that you love her and that you are there for her, but you have certain rules.

If her mom is a first class fuckup, then none of that is acceptable and you need to get her ass out of that situation even if she is kicking and screaming. Make a judge tell you she isn't living with you anymore.

my sisters been fucking up huge since 14. shes 37 now...

I have two,ones 21,the other is almost 17.

My oldest was kinda tough,wouldn't go to a regular high school,had a 14 inch purple Mohawk,etc.....she's now in college,getting good grades,etc.

They come around eventually if you let them. Phone Post 3.0

Mine is 2. I am buying good whiskey and fine double razors to bring zen into my life for these types of moments.

Only a good shave and a neat single will make life better in the OP scenario. Phone Post 3.0

Why does everybody say "she will realize you did her right, the place with no rules wasn't good for her", like every person realizes this?

I would actually think most don't.

The majority of teenagers are moody and emotionally unstable. They're teenagers. Ride it out and keep doing the right thing. Vent here when you need to without taking any of the wackadoo bullshit trolljobs to heart and you'll do great. Just remember your little baby girl and everything will come in to focus.

edit: nvm

It's hard to say for sure without knowing more about the relationship between the two of you prior to the blow.

There is a good possibility that subconsciously she is testing you. To see if you care/love her. I wouldn't definitively demand for her to come back to the house, but I think it would be good to try to rationally persuade her to come back without slandering her mom.

I have 2 year girl and a soon to be 4 year old girl. I hope it never comes to this.

I wish you the best and hope everything works out for you. Phone Post 3.0

I know what you are saying RJJH. I know a bright kid - I worked with his dad - kid had tons of potential. Around 15 or so he started with mj and booze. His dad put him through all types of programs and counseling and was always there for him.

He ended up on meth and is 19 now - at first the dad tried to help but that didn't work. Sometimes you have to let someone hit rock bottom before they are willing to accept help.

Not saying this has anything to do with the OP, but I can see where RJJH is coming from.

"rationally persuade"

No offense at all, but that will not work with most teenage girls - heck with most teenagers in general.

Dude, you're so close. I say you fight for her again, but the day she turns 18 you either change the locks, or start charging her rent

Teenagers are going to teenage. Phone Post 3.0