The Founding Fathers are Not Very Handsome

First off, I’m no Handsome Jack.

But goddamn the Founding Fathers all look like a bunch of dudes who look like Megan’s Law database entries…

Ben Franklin

George Washington

Paul Revere

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Sam Adams

John Hancock

Ben Franklin, notorious globetrotting poonhound well into old age, get his name out of your mouth and replace it with his cock.

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they were old men

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His John Han Cock?

“Never too old to fuck”
-Ben Franklin

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So was Sean Connery. Where are all the Sean Conneries of Ye Old

Franklin fucked France harder than Hitler and they LOVED him for it.

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mexico any better?

I think Jack Black is related to Sam Adams . Just picture the raised eyebrow and smirk

Maybe not.
But they were some forward thinking men.
Put some respek on their names.

Paul revere IMO. I see they didn’t even have an easily accessible picture of John Adams or his sons fat ass.

No but why would we care about Mexico? We are talking about the ugly American founders.