U Know U Watch To Much MMA When...

When you friend tells you that you might have to fight some kid at a party and to express how unafraid you are of him, you say "Please, that kids such a pussy, I wouldnt even be afraid to jump guard on him."

The look on my friends face was priceless. Complete look of "WTF????"


i get it. although it isn't a very strong statement to make unless the kid has experience with submissions.

well the prevalent idea about jumping to guard in mma these days is that its a really bad idea and your asking for trouble

I think thats a very strong statement. You would have to be INCREDIBLY confident that that guy was a total and complete sissy to start the fight on your back no matter how strong your guard is and how little they know of submissions. Guard is just that a guard to protect you because you are in an inferior position. When im training with new guys in the gym I always tell them that, guard is not an offensive position, its to protect you until you can open up and get a sweep or sub.


"U Know U watch to Much MMA when"

My Father waited 20 years to have another kid she's four years of age and whenever i am in town i teach her Grappling she has a cute kesa-gatame and kata -gatame.
She's too Young to know Submission holds so i will just teach her hold downs and pins till she gets older.

i agree with sambat

When you pass your wifes guard in bed....
When you hook to the ribs to make the pass...
When she goes down on you and you transition to a triangle...
When you bridge her off of full mount...
When you use a forearm to the throat to control her while your in her guard...

When you knee her in the ass while your dreaming of being in a real fight...


Phfantasm saved this thread from certain doom. Well in.

When you scoot out of bed in the morning using your heel..because you don't want to give up your back.


When you're slow dancing, and you can't resist the urge to do a single leg trip into side control.

"when you size up everyone you see and think of the easiest way to take them out would be"

"when you triangle your pillow and throw elbows"

"when you do the jiu-jitsu stand up with your arm protecting your face at home"

"when you practice sweeping your dog"

"when your dog is named after a submission"


When you take the time to read dumbass threads such as this one...