Walking home about 5 mins out. Gotta poop

Fuck me. The farts have been real and really questionable. This isn't cool. Bushes all around me but it's really nice out and other people are strolling as well. Tiny thinnest low cut socks aren't gonna sop up this plop if it happens. I've been eating clean and no drinking so I'm not giving up yet. But it hurts. 70% I make it home with how I currently feel. But we all know how quickly that can change...

3 Likes

If in Cali let that shit go all over that sidewalk 

3 Likes

Update? 

And you took the time to post here instead of making a run for it?

cfochs -

And you took the time to post here instead of making a run for it?

Running would have led to diarrhea dripping down my legs. I made it home and thought, "huh, not so bad. I can even untie my shoes and take them off before going upstairs." I'm not sure if it was that or the being home, but I nearly lost it on my way up to the bathroom. Fuckin splatterhouse in this toilet right now.

Pics?

1 Like

I once didn't make it home in time while out for a stroll. It was not solid by any means.

I was wearing shorts and a pair of tennis shoes. One of my neighbors a couple blocks down came out of his driveway to say hi. I yelled "don't" then he started asking me why, made a funny face and turned around and walked into his house. 

By the time I made it home my tennis shoes were filled.

5 Likes

Why is your butthole so loose? 

1 Like

Shotgunnin butt

Now this is a thread I can get behind.  The OP is basically a story of my life.

Also, Wiki's story almost had me in tears lol

DONT!  HAHAHA

WikiTheWalrus -

I once didn't make it home in time while out for a stroll. It was not solid by any means.

I was wearing shorts and a pair of tennis shoes. One of my neighbors a couple blocks down came out of his driveway to say hi. I yelled "don't" then he started asking me why, made a funny face and turned around and walked into his house. 

By the time I made it home my tennis shoes were filled.

Best post of May lol

Floppy Divac - 
cfochs -

And you took the time to post here instead of making a run for it?

Running would have led to diarrhea dripping down my legs. I made it home and thought, "huh, not so bad. I can even untie my shoes and take them off before going upstairs." I'm not sure if it was that or the being home, but I nearly lost it on my way up to the bathroom. Fuckin splatterhouse in this toilet right now.

Haha I knew that’d happen. I’m a veteran of your situation, and it’s a phenomenon I’ve wanted someone to do a PHD on: why do we somehow manage to hold on until we are home, and then all hell breaks loose. Must be psychological. Has to be.

I lost yet another sock the other night half way through my road work. I’m lucky, as I have bush all around, but they’re filled with Taipans! Fun times trying not to (literally) get my ass bitten whilst splattering my goodness amongst the long grass.

1 Like
Black Doug -

Why is your butthole so loose? 

Liquid shit doesn't care how tight or loose your butthole is. But to answer your question, probably from the assplay.

You seem very together for a man about to shit his pants.

tiger07 -
Floppy Divac - 
cfochs -

And you took the time to post here instead of making a run for it?

Running would have led to diarrhea dripping down my legs. I made it home and thought, "huh, not so bad. I can even untie my shoes and take them off before going upstairs." I'm not sure if it was that or the being home, but I nearly lost it on my way up to the bathroom. Fuckin splatterhouse in this toilet right now.

Haha I knew that’d happen. I’m a veteran of your situation, and it’s a phenomenon I’ve wanted someone to do a PHD on: why do we somehow manage to hold on until we are home, and then all hell breaks loose. Must be psychological. Has to be.

I lost yet another sock the other night half way through my road work. I’m lucky, as I have bush all around, but they’re filled with Taipans! Fun times trying not to (literally) get my ass bitten whilst splattering my goodness amongst the long grass.

Seriously. I’ve made it home and had fecal leakage from the time I get to the door waaay too many times. Most of the walk home in fact that was my biggest fear.

When I was 12 I had situation like that, I thought I could play outside as long as possible and run in to shit...  well I played literally bout 2 seconds to long. It hit hard and fast, I ran inside up the steps straight to bathroom, as I quickly pulled down my pants and jumped for the toilet, it ALL came out.... literally in a giant Hershey kiss blob right IN FRONT of the toilet. I literally missed the toilet, my ass couldnt hold it anymore and it just shot out before I could sit down... best part is I didn’t know what to do so I wiped n yelled for my parents, when my step dad came up n saw it “oh my god it’s a shit blob!!”  I ran back out to play and my mom made him clean it!!!    I’m in tears right now thinking about it...  we tell that story to this day lol 

2 Likes

I find it weird that nobody warns people how, as you age, the probability of shitting yourself increases. The cold and hot flashes you get when you are in the final countdown and getting annoyed when people talk to you and your trying to hold it in are common symptoms.

Only shit myself once in my adult life. It was 15 min from time to leave work. Was in the small bathroom at the front of the warehouse taking a piss. Tried to do too much and blow my nose as I was pissing. The second I forced the air out I shit all over myself. After cussing and saying my no no no's I waddled out to the uniform rack and stole someone's pants. I walked into he big bathroom and went into the owner of the companies shower and used his body was to clean myself. Got changed and walked out to the time clock throwing my shit clothes away in a trashcan on the way out. Clocked out walked out the door and hopped into my buddies car to ride home since mine was in the shop. No one ever knew about it not even my buddy who picked me up. About the smoothest way you can shit on yourself at work. 

I sharted in my car last year trying to hold it in on the way home.  Not sure I got it all out of my car seat.  The leather has these tiny perferations in it.

One of the worst experiences of my life was having to take a shit real bad, being on foot, and about 20 min. away from where I was living. No bathrooms around. Just houses…and no little places to hide and drop a loaf.

Long story short…It was agony. I had to stop walking a bunch of times for fear of shitting myself. Clenching my asshole and dealing with the stomach pain + pressure was almost impossible. It was so bad I wanted to cry.

After what seemed like days, I finally made it home. I just barely avoided shitting my pants.

.