Bullchit: Yellow Bamboo No Touch Chi Blast master tests himself against BJJ

Mixed martial arts is not what it appears to be - a body of techniques. To see it is a mix of specific effective strikes, pins, submissions, takedowns, etc is to miss what’s really going on.

The heart of mixed martial arts is Active Resistance - actually trying something, against someone who is also trying something. Although the concept is not complex, there are entire martial arts systems that developed without ever once actually trying it.

Or, in the case below, just this once.

No Touch Chi Blast vs. BJJ: The Yellow Bamboo edition

Lack of Active Resistance in martial arts reaches a peak with the notorious Bali-based martial art/cult/White Magic group Yellow Bamboo. They claim to have over 30,000 adherents worldwide. Yellow Bamboo also claims advanced adherents can levitate.

Compliant students flopping around like true believers at a Benny Hinn revival is not active resistance, and thus, techniques that are not just worthless but are dangerous to the practitioner, get passed on from teacher to student.

However, one fine day, Yellow Bamboo met reality, in the form of amused BJJ students Peter Dellys (black tee) and Fraser Johnston.

“For years they have plied their lines about ‘no-touch knockouts’ on usenet (particularly rec.martial-arts) and several years ago, Yellow Bamboo’s challenge was taken up” explains Dellys.

The challenge took place on a beach in Perth, Australia.

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Yellow Bamboo members reportedly believe touching someone who’s got a charged up chi blast in them can be fatal. Baffled voices can be heard in the background saying, “he touched him, he touched him, how could he touch him?”

Dellys neatly sums it up at the very end.

“They’re losers,” he explained.

Yellow Bamboo believers also claimed to have passed the famed James Randi’s million dollar paranormal challenge, but that Randi refused to pay up. The video “evidence” was filmed with a potato, at night. The tester was not allowed to run at the Yellow Bamboo devotee alone, but rather was surrounded by several other adherents.

Skeptics would say that when he fell over, it was because someone used a Chi move called “shove” on him.

Or maybe Chi only works at night, when filmed with a potato.

And lastly, the Yellow Bamboo cultees are sad and weird, but that little dog is awesome.