New Reality Competitions

That thread where Gerald talked about his Reality Fighting training (read "Stalking and Mugging") got me thinking: there must be heaps of virgin Reality training territory out there...

How about NHB Scuba Fighting? No time limits (if you discount the limited air supply), they already use belts and ground skills ain't going to save you 50ft below.

Or Drunken Master?, 'cause let's face it, more often than not if there's fist there are flaggons nearby.

What about some sort of combined Road Rage Sprint Cycling Vale-Tudo event (Vale-Tour de Brunswick?)... Gerald, this could be the start of your comeback!

Come on, give us your ideas!

Haha, great idea, was thinking of a similar thread...

How about reality vagrant cage fighting??

Simple concept. Round up say x10 inner city vagrants from Melbourne CBD (then Sydney and so on for an eventual Aussie champ!!!), then you give each contestant $1 to begin the game. Lock them all in a UFC style cage together, all 10 at once.

First contestant to secure all $10 wins the event.

Imagine the opening seconds when all x10 derroes are trying their best begging line, something like "hey mate can you spare us a dollar, I need train fare to see my dying baby in Geelong???".

About half a minute into the game, most of them will realise that no-one is going to be stupid enough to give up any money via persuasion and an all out viscious bloodbath ensues until only one is left victorious to scavenge the dollar coins from the felled opponents!!!

Consider it a job creation scheme, we could apply for government funding as it would be keeping people off the streets and cleaninig up the cities.

Feedback?

Gerald.

ps. Very very poor taste I know, hope you see the funny side ;)

Sounds like Bumfights. Great concept brought to reality!

How about tying Gerald's bumfights with either Australian Idol or The Hothouse?

No, My Resturant Rules as per usual BUT you have to employ smack-heads! Each night would provide heaps of classic footage of the owners catching the staff thieving the till, randomly leaving the resturant and offering patrons "specials" that aren't on the menu.

Hothouse vs Big Brother!!!

Two more ideas from training last night (thanks Brendon W):

Celebrity Site-Manager - Maggie T trying to get 30 plaster union workers out of the pub early to finish the job on time.

Celebrity Standover - I had great images of the Wiggles doing that pistol shooting hand movement of theirs demanding money then getting their head's kicked in. "Wake Up Jeff!" indeed!

How about Survivor style challenges in a UFC sized octagon using your manager as your opponent?

On this one you don't eat much for a couple of weeks, whine like a silly bitch over something noone else cares about, then compete for immunity, which is just a cover to get the chance to punch the f**k out of your boss!

Any takers????

After watching the Today show this morning (22/4/04)

Transgender NHB Whip Sport

In case you missed it: take two likely lads from the bush, one takes the role of a sexually challenged individual, put them in fencing masks and dry-as-a-bones. Arm each with a stock whip and have them crack the spunk out of one another repeatedly on National TV.