The Canned my play !!!!

Two critics bagged the poo poo out of my play !!

Next time I choose the script, and not the producer.
It is still mid-season, we are booked out and the audience seems to enjoy it :P

I got to act, direct and choregraph a dance to"safety dance", so I am happy.

But....ahhh two critics really hated it :P

Failed Director,
Kym Robinson

Here is the review...

Music-hall whodunnit flounders

MURDER AT THE MUSIC HALL: Noarlunga Theatre Company

The Arts Centre, 22 Gawler Street, Port Noarlunga

Until December 6

Reviewed by Rod Lewis


MARY McMahon's comedy whodunnit blends music-hall style entertainment with a murder mystery - a womaniser is bumped off and his ghost returns to help the police (and audience) solve the crime.

First-time director Kym Robinson updates the musical selection to a popular 1980s soundtrack which proves to be one of the few saving graces of the show.

The juvenile script offers too much free range for an inexperienced director, leaving this production flailing for laughs, pace and dignity.

The disjointed action jerks back and forth in time and place, intermingling the flimsy plot with the skits and songs of a shady music-hall revue where all the players are suspects.

Robinson fares better as the narrator of the show, his dialogue with the audience casual and quirky.

Maggie Smith - fresh from playing Mrs Slocum in the company's recent premiere of Are You Being Served? - reminds us why she is one the group's best assets.

Dressed as a precocious brat, her rendition of I Want Candy is a delight.

A lengthy Cinderella skit is but one example of material more suited to children than adults, despite Michael Veltman's wonderfully campy Herald and vain attempts to make it more adult-orientated.

The rest of the actors show either their inexperience or disinterest. They mumble lines, grin at the audience and struggle with adlibs and their songs.

The energy of Tanna Wells' choreography and the numerous dancers who groove to the beat of the 1980s tunes are the real stars of the show.

The diversity of dance routines is plentiful, each number conjuring up fond memories of bad hair and worse fashions.

But Michael Bywaters' uneven lighting has the cast moving through patches of shadow too often.

More suited to a school concert than a cabaret production, Murder at the Music Hall is an awful Australian musical written and produced with no imagination and little technical skill.

Robinson needed more experience on stage before attempting to direct, and a mentor to help him with this production would not have gone astray.

A less ambitious play might also have been more successful for a first-timer.

A disappointing ending to an otherwise fantastic year for the company.

ยท Abridged version of this review published in the Southern Times Messenger, 26-11-03, p. 29.

Well all I can say is....we had fun !! :)

With hardly any actors showing up to audition and a skeleton tech crew, we kicked ass :)

These are the same people that though the "English patient" was the best thing ever ! done ....

Poo heads.


Might have to stick to fighting...just joking aslong as you all had fun.

Are the critics in the play industry anything like the fight know the ones sitting on the outside of the ring drinking lots or piss yelling at the fighters how gutless and hopeless they are yet when you ask most of the fight critics how they went in their fights you find out they have never had the balls to get in the ring (isnt that a Guns and Roses song?).
Kym what have the 2 critics done in their own lives?

thank's fella's. It doesn't really turk me so much as for the fact there are a few youngin's in the cast who worked there tales of. Like the lighting guy is just 15, and the critic slams him...

critics are critics. There job is to watch, pick and convey opinion.

Im in the business of doing.

My next play will kick :)


I thought their job was 2 try and sound witty and smart(moreso then their rival critics do) while knocking others work. Good on ya mate, it aint an easy task to put on play, let alone one that the audience likes(they pay 4 tickets, critics don't so who cares).


Renaissance man? Great to see a good fighter with creative/artistic/intellectual tenedencies.

Good Work Fella!


Were you wearing your flat hat?

It may have made the difference either way... :)

Hey Kimbo,

Kudos and Karma for getting up there and giving it a fucking good go. Tough gig you picked there, I'd rather hit the mats with Bonello any time.

Just remember the one things about critics, they're usually failed actors/directors/etc themselves. Explains why they're so bitter and jaded.


Tim Ritchie

Thanks guys.

Nah, I look like a gay 80s pop dont ask me what is going on there. Hell Im the director and I have no idea what the hell my character is about...80s ?

The flat cap ;p hehe well I should wear it more often, but It creates to much of a generation gap.
And I no longer drive a volvo, so...I think i need a new one.

Take care food.


nice work fella, screw the critics mate, what do they know? haha

anyways man i know you've worked hard on this so congratulations that its doing well, Jess and i might try and pop down and see it.. give me a call, and we'll figure it out mate :)


No Ben, I have not competed BJJ. You must have me confused with some other extremely handsome guy.

good luck with your next one kym. just stick ot basics and rip off grease or sumthing hehe. they cant diss a classic.

going to be directing again?


Sure thing champ, this weekend is the last it will be good to see you there. I wanna shoot down to the fight club next week and train with you lads and catch up with the Mark1 ;) Take care bro.


Thanks mate. I love directing, I really hope to, I was just testing the waters on this one as I have lots to learn. Admitedly I was pretty scattered and had a lot on leading up to it. I hope to get some fights under me next year, and depending on how that pans out. Im looking at putting on an improv theatre restraunt show for Xmas next year. Still working things out on that.

All the best


Sounds like it went well except for the critic good luck on the next one and keep in touch.


Thanks big guy.

How is everything going over in the States ?

Looks like we will be doing a HUGE show late next year. Fun Fun Fun.

Look after yourself.


Things are good busy but good.It's freezing cold here we have a little snow and all thge lakes are pretty much frozen.Good luck with everything and merry christmas.

Mate I will have to send some of our heat your way...its 40c here tommorow and holding pretty much.

Stay busy and look after yourself. Tell Andre' to leave them strippers alone ;)

Train hard my friend and merry Xmas to you and your family.

Hope to see you soon.