Wombat's UFC Review

Tito Ortiz vs. Patrick Cote

Ortiz spent 3 rounds elbowing Cote in the face but somehow Ortiz came away looking like a loser and Cote left the cage looking like a champ. What is this? Bizarro World? Ortiz looked wet-hit-pants scared through the whole fight, while Cote looked like he’d just taken three big hoots of laughing gas. Mezger would’ve put Ortiz in the hospital if God hadn’t put Mezger there first.

Matt Hughes vs Georges St-Pierre

St. Pierre took Hughes down. He spin-kicked him into the fence. He even was able to get up after Hughes took him down. I was so excited, I could barely contain my bacon, maple syrup and beer. Then, St. Pierre made the Conan-vs-Sak mistake and paid for it. The difference – St. Pierre will be back.

Robbie Lawler vs Evan Tanner

You ever have a day where you slam a guy and then he puts you into a triangle choke and you decide you’d rather be at home watching re-runs of Ren & Stimpy than stuck between some sweaty dude’s legs? Lawler has.

Frank Trigg vs Renato Verissimo

What’s the best way to beat an All-American wrestler? Wrestle him? No, sorry Renato, that’s stupid. In fact, that’s exactly what you shouldn’t do, just like you shouldn’t go for kneebars while someone is tee’ing off on your head.

Jorge Rivera vs Rich Franklin

Franklin could’ve made this a 1-round fight if he’d just taken Jorge down in the first round instead of the third. Instead, he drove him into the fence and tried the old “how many elbows can you land on my face?” routine. Great strategy. Why not wrestle Trigg and box with Belfort while you’re at it?

Tony Fryklund vs Ivan Salaverry

Remember the old Super-friends cartoons? The Green Lantern would fight Sinestro and Aqua Man would fight the Black Manta and everyone would pair off and in the end the only guys left were Batman and a Gorilla who could talk (Gorilla Grog), so they would fight each other, despite the fact that they shared no common characteristics. This fight was like that. Salaverry has more tricks than Batman has in his utility belt. He’s one of those guys who’re good at everything. They can kick your ass, do your taxes and then build a decorative coffee table before you wake up. Fryklund has two tools and they are both fists. Batman beats the Gorilla every time, even if it can talk.

Travis Lutter vs Marvin Eastman

Marvin Eastman is a great striker and grappler with awful, awful luck. Did that punch even hit him? I watched it in super-slow-mo and I don’t think it did. Lutter must have the worst-smelling gloves in UFC history to have an effect like that. They should give Eastman a fight against a crippled old woman, just to see if he’s truly cursed. I’ll put fifty on the granny if it happens.

Not that it really matters in the long run, but Trigg was never an All American. He placed second at the Junior College level though.

Wombat...you will always have a special place in my mental LOL's.

Great job...I expect Wombat's Pride Predictions by Friday.

Carry on...:)

Wombat, Wombat, Wombat.....of all people, I thought for sure you were gonna say something about Tanner's goofy hair!! I guess I'll take a crack at it.

Was that Evan Tanner who triangled Robbie Lawler or Alicia Keys??

LMAO @ Gilly! Good one! I forgot about his hair ...