Road House Movie Review: ‘Horrendous’ Remake proves McGregor ‘can’t act,’ may appeal to ‘virgins and WWE fans’

“That man is the least believable tough guy in the history of cinema.” — True Geordie on Jake Gyllenhaal


Hollywood was determined to bring us a remake of Road House, the 1989 classic starring the late Patrick Swayze. When the first attempt crashed and burned, a direct result of Ronda Rousey’s knockout loss to Holly Holm at UFC 193, the project bounced around development hell until late 2022, thanks to the box office clout of Jake Gyllenhaal.

Unfortunately, influencers like True Geordie (real name Brian Davis) remain unimpressed.
“The only people who can suspend belief enough to believe Jake Gyllenhaal is capable of being Bruce Lee are like virgins and WWE fans,” Davis said. “He was far more believable as a gay cowboy. This is actually a remake of a trashy but classic old school movie featuring Patrick Swayze who was actually believable in that movie. Some people just have the aura of, ‘I could just kick your ass.’ This Jake fella doesn’t have that, which is probably why they brought in Conor McGregor, who can kick people’s ass — just can’t act, unfortunately.”

Former UFC two-division champion Conor McGregor will star as “Knox,” the main antagonist who can be seen warring with Gyllenhaal’s character in the first trailer. “Notorious” drew early praise from Marshall Teague, who played “Jimmy” opposite Swayze’s “Dalton” in the original film.

theres a reason its not making the big screen


The hype for Conor has sunk to new lows

Not sure he can even pull a million ppvs at this point even if he comes back which is doubtful,

he loses another one and he’ll be headlining fight nights




Isnt True Geordie that big tattooed roided guy who had texts leaked where he was talking about wanting to suck black dicks?


Jake Busey is smiling at the fact that Road House 2 might see a slight surge in streaming views.


Man I feel stupid because I never knew road house 2 existed :joy:


I actually read that all of the early reviews came back with high ratings on the movie, and the director was promised a big theater release, but then there was a purchase of the studio or something by Amazon during the making of the movie, or some shit like that, and they also promised the director a theater release, then renegged on the promise so they could use the movie to draw subscribers to their streaming platform.

The director was pissed because all indications implied that the movie was destined for theater success according to the early numbers with test audiences etc… and he refuses to make any appearances to promote the film for Amazon, whom he claims is using the movie to sell blenders.

This may not be entirely accurate, but it’s the gist of what I took away from the article the other day. I’ll withhold judgment on the performances until I see it for myself.


Doesnt sound like he’s even watched the movie.

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Brian Davis (born: January 26, 1987 (1987-01-26) [age 37]), better known online as True Geordie (formerly known as FootballFan533), is an English YouTuber from Newcastle upon Tyne, England.


True Geordie - Wikitubia - Fandom

](True Geordie | Wikitubia | Fandom)

Brokeback Mountain was a strange choice if Jake had plans to be an action star.
I don’t think Clint was railed in any of the dollars trilogy.


I finally saw the trailer for this, and I’d say that reason is because it looks like absolute dogshit. I’d liken this re-make to a trainwreck in that it’s so bad it’s hard to look away.

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Jake Gyllenhaal Love GIF

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I could give a shit about the trailer or subsequent reviews by unknown Internet personalities. I’m seeing this fucking thing.


You mean Road House or Brokeback?


Film reviews by True Geordie?

It looks like a cheesy and fun basic action movie… will be fun to watch with bag of popcorn while I play with my wife’s boobies… some of you guys are homos. Go read gossip girl magazine.


Movie definitely looks fun. Will watch, but Jake’s character didn’t really come off as likeable in the trailer. His one-liners were pretty basic.

He just can’t pull this tough guy act off. He’s tried to play an alpha type in his past few movies but he just doesn’t fit the role with any of it :joy: