The only use for Karma is to help us take shitty things lightly and take great things modestly?K that??s just a thought though.
I??m not religious, a battle hardened badass, good with social stuff, or even a clever ??politician?? in these matters but I think your focus (especially from your role) is to work on the kid and not the situation. Any action that takes you personally out of the gym or brings this junk in is just not really necessary and possibly brings you to the level of all this ugliness.
He is your concern then work with him. Engage him, show him that there is cool shit out there and options to whatever these dudes offer. They are not beating him up daily and a bit of deformation is not going to drive him to ??columbine?? anything?K and if it does his issues are probably truly beyond our assistance and would take a great effort over a long time to help?K are you prepared for life long mentoring? Damn, I guess we could go on and on about the parameters of an instructor, being a good person, and your contributions to society; one kid at a time ??
Or you can just keep you nose out it and offer what help you can as your business and growing personal relationship provides.
Of course I wouldn??t be on here if one little part of me didn??t want a spectacular ass whooping of the bully either by the bullied or hired gun.
Hopefully this bullying helps to motivate this guy to train. This guy can take himself out of harms way by working dillegently and improving himself to a point where these guys won't be a threat to him at "poker night."
I am sure if you keep training him, you'll get him to a point where he can whip all their asses.
Once he is capable of beating their asses, their harassment won't sting so much.
Then it simply becomes a matter of whether or not he needs to PROVE to THEM that he can, indeed beat them down.
I think that the last issue is kind of a pointless exercise of ego, because this guy (and you) probably aren't trying to prove to these loser bullies how tough you are -it seems like you want EVERYONE ELSE to see that you can whip the ass of some untrained loud-mouth losers.
Anyone with half a brain will have the sense to know that you'll put a beating down on any one of them. And are you really trying to "prove yourself" to anyone without enough sense to know?
At the same time this provactive behavior is like poking a tiger with a very short stick -you want the idiots to get mauled just on principle. Talk to them and outline their options: tell them that if they continue with their slander they are choosing to fight with you. Give them other options which will allow them to save face, but will also make the bullshit stop. For example, I think that it would be more productive to say "if you stop this idiocy, we can just pretend nothing happened," instead of demanding a written apology "or else."
(Another example, you could dump a drink on the instigators head when you see him in public and hope that he swings at you so you can "defend yourself." However, this will probably instigate more passive aggressive behavior, rather than solving anything.)
The key point is that you control the situation by taking initiative and framing the situation under terms in which you have total control. Whatever decision you make, my sure that you're in control of the situation rather than letting morons manipulate you by pushing your buttons -you know you are smarter than that.
Dude 5 oclock, it sounds like you want him to give the bullies the man speech from -- Second Hand Lions-- actually that does not seem like such a bad idea
Bulling is all psychological, a bully will pick his target with out even knowing it. Small things like the way someone walks and talks is what get them into trouble in the first place.
Then the bully with challange the guy and the guy wont even know its happening. Call him something like "curly". If the guy reacts in the wrong manner bully will pass it off as a joke, and move on. ]
Size, strength means nothng its all about intent. I worked in a jail for 4 years and some of the most feared prisoners were 5'5" and 55 kg.
Sad thing is the best thing your friend could do is walk straight up to this guy next time he sees him and really, really hurt him. He doesnt have to win the fight, just let the guy know if he fucks about with him hes going to have to fight him.
legally speaking, if they come to your gym and you don't do anything but gently take them down and put them in a simple head and arm (not cranking it), how long can you hold him before it's considered kidnapping? 1hr? 2hrs? always thought that they'd think it's funny for the first few minutes, but after a couple of hours of lying there w/ no where to go??? could make it even more fun by having a cell phone and making calls as he squirms under you.
LEMon ur one of my favorite posters here and was very impressed with ur grappling But deepdown we both know nothing will make u feel better than asking the bullies to spar and kicking their asses
Okay, to those that insist that karma doesn't exist based upon the fact that you know so many "bad people" that have good lives, my answer is this:
Like I said, you may not know everything about them - they COULD be suffering. Not everyone that commits suicide walks around with their head down. They could be strutting around putting up a front but have underlying issues that you do not know about (i.e. dude from Suddenly Susan). "I know these people very well and know they don't suffer in any way." Well, again, karma runs late but she always arrives. I know first hand. If you think that you are getting away with doing harm to others... you are MASSIVELY UNDERESTIMATING karma.
Also, those that know the "good people" (i.e. newborn or toddler) that suffer or die for "no reason".... there's a reason. God knows what he/she's doing. Either they've sinned in the past or present... or even in a past life. It may take time, but I firmly believe everyone pays. Someone please photoshop Aleksander Emelianenko's tattoo and have his grim reaper holding LEMon's friend. Thanks. :P
Edit: P.S. LEMon, that last sentence was in good fun, but on a serious note I'm impressed that you're concerned about a friend and seek advice to help him. Most people would coward from the situation and ignore it.
Let him handle it. Guide him, teach him and help develop his self-
confidence. If he chooses to continue to hang out with these guys then
eventually he will put his skills to use. Ultimately it isnt your fight.
"Also, those that know the "good people" (i.e. newborn or toddler) that suffer or die for "no reason".... there's a reason. God knows what he/she's doing. Either they've sinned in the past or present... or even in a past life."
Entreri its funny u say that coz i did some research. Bullying happens all the way till you are a senior apparently, there are lots of sites devoted to adults regarding bullying in workplaces, relationships etc.